Motivation, soft skills and life hacks




MOTIVATION, SELF HELP

SEVEN THINGS THAT AFFECT YOUR SUCCESS VIA VIBRATORY FREQUENCY FROM THE POINT OF VIEW OF QUANTUM PHYSICS.
All of us are working to be successful. Yet so we know the subtle science of how we can impact our success to come to us sooner than we think.
Vibration in quantum physics means that everything is energy. We are beings that vibrate at certain frequencies. Each vibration is equivalent to a feeling and in the “vibrational” world, there are only two types of vibrations, the positive and the negative. Any feeling causes you to emit a vibration that can be positive or negative.
1st.- THE THOUGHTS
Every thought emits a frequency towards the Universe and that frequency returns towards the origin, then in the case, if you have negative thoughts, of discouragement, sadness, anger, fear, all of that turns towards you. That is why it is so important that you take care of the quality of your thoughts and learn to cultivate more positive thoughts.
2nd – THE COMPANIES
The people around you directly influence your vibrational frequency. If you surround yourself with happy, positive, determined people, you will also enter into that vibration, now if you surround yourself with complaining, cursing and pessimistic people, be careful! Well, they may be decreasing your frequency and as a consequence preventing you from making the Law of Attraction work in your favor.
3rd – THE MUSIC
The music is very powerful. If you only listen to music that speaks of death, betrayal, sadness, abandonment, all that will interfere in what you vibrate. Pay attention to the lyrics of the music you listen to, it may be decreasing your vibrational frequency. And remember: You draw into your life exactly what you vibrate.
4th – THE THINGS YOU SEE
When you watch programs that deal with misfortune, death, betrayal, etc. your brain accepts that as a reality and releases a whole chemistry in your body, causing your vibrational frequency to be affected. See things that do you good and help you vibrate at a higher frequency.
5th – THE ENVIRONMENT
Whether at home or at work, if you spend much of your time in a disorganized and dirty environment, this will also affect your vibrational frequency. Improve what is around you, organize and clean your environment. Show the Universe that you are apt to receive much more. Take care of what you already have.
6th – THE WORD
If you tend to complain or speak badly about things and people, this affects your vibrational frequency. To maintain your high frequency it is essential that you eliminate the habit of complaining and speaking badly about others. Then avoid making dramas and victimize yourself. Take responsibility for the choices of your life.
7th – THE GRATITUDE
Gratitude positively affects your vibrational frequency. That is a habit that you should incorporate right now into your life. Start to thank for everything, for the good things and those that you consider not good, thanks for all the experiences that you have lived. Gratitude opens the doors for good things to flow positively in your life.



The 3 Decisions that will dictate your Life

If you make these decisions unconsciously, you'll end up like majority of people who tend to be out of shape physically, exhausted emotionally and often financially stressed. But if you make these decisions consciously, you can literally change the course of your life today. 
Decision 1: Carefully choose what to focus on.
At every moment, millions of things compete for your attention. You can focus on things that are happening right here and now or on what you want to create in the future. Or you can focus on the past.
Where focus goes, energy flows. What you focus on and your pattern for doing so shapes your entire life. 
Which area do you tend to focus on more: what you have or what’s missing from your life?
I’m sure you think about both sides of this coin. But if you examine your habitual thoughts, what do you tend to spend most of your time dwelling on? 
Rather than focusing on what you don’t have and begrudging those who are better off than you financially, perhaps you should acknowledge that you have much to be grateful for and some of it has nothing to do with money. You can be grateful for your health, family, friends, opportunities and mind.
Developing a habit of appreciating what you have can create a new level of emotional well-being and wealth. But the real question is, do you take time to deeply feel grateful with your mind, body, heart and soul? That’s where the joy, happiness and fulfillment can be found. 
Consider a second pattern of focus that affects the quality of your life: Do you tend to focus more on what you can control or what you can’t?
If you focus on what you can’t control, you’ll have more stress in life. You can influence many aspects of your life but you usually can’t control them. 
When you adopt this pattern of focus, your brain has to make another decision:  
Decision 2: Figure out, What does this all mean?
Ultimately, how you feel about your life has nothing to do with the events in it or with your financial condition or what has (or hasn't) happened to you. The quality of your life is controlled by the meaning you give these things.
Most of the time you may be unaware of the effect of your unconscious mind in assigning meaning to life’s events. 
When something happens that disrupts your life (a car accident, a health issue, a job loss), do you tend to think that this is the end or the beginning?
If someone confronts you, is that person insulting you, coaching you or truly caring for you?
Does a devastating problem mean that God is punishing you or challenging you? Or is it possible that this problem is a gift from God? 
Your life takes on whatever meaning you give it. With each meaning comes a unique feeling or emotion and the quality of your life involves where you live emotionally. 
I always ask during my seminars, “How many of you know someone who is on antidepressants and still depressed?” Typically 85 percent to 90 percent of those assembled raise their hands.
How is this possible? The drugs should make people feel better. It's true that antidepressants do come with labels warning that suicidal thoughts are a possible side effect.
But no matter how much a person drugs himself, if he constantly focuses on what he can’t control in life and what’s missing, he won't find it hard to despair. If he adds to that a meaning like “life is not worth living,” that's an emotional cocktail that no antidepressant can consistently overcome. 
Yet if that same person can arrive at a new meaning, a reason to live or a belief that all this was meant to be, then he will be stronger than anything that ever happened to him.
When people shift their habitual focus and meanings, there’s no limit on what life can become. A change of focus and a shift in meaning can literally alter someone's biochemistry in minutes. 
So take control and always remember: Meaning equals emotion and emotion equals lifeChoose consciously and wisely. Find an empowering meaning in any event, and wealth in its deepest sense will be yours today. 
Once you create a meaning in your mind, it creates an emotion, and that emotion leads to a state for making your third decision:
Decision 3: What will you do?  
The actions you take are powerfully shaped by the emotional state you're in. If you're angry, you're going to behave quite differently than if you're feeling playful or outrageous. 
If you want to shape your actions, the fastest way is to change what you focus on and shift the meaning to be something more empowering.
Two people who are angry will behave differently. Some pull back. Others push through.
Some individuals express anger quietly. Others do so loudly or violently. Yet others suppress it only to look for a passive-aggressive opportunity to regain the upper hand or even exact revenge.  
Where do these patterns come from? People tend to model their behavior on those they respect, enjoy and love.
The people who frustrated or angered you? You often reject their approaches.
Yet far too often you may find yourself falling back into patterns you witnessed over and over again in your youth and were displeased by. 
It’s very useful for you to become aware of your patterns when you are frustrated, angry or sad or feel lonely. You can’t change your patterns if you’re not aware of them.
Now that you’re aware of the power of these three decisions, start looking for role models who are experiencing what you want out of life. I promise you that those who have passionate relationships have a totally different focus and arrive at totally different meanings for the challenges in relationships than people who are constantly bickering or fighting. 
It’s not rocket science. If you become aware of the differences in how people approach these three decisions, you’ll have a pathway to help you create a permanent positive change in any area of life. 
This piece was adapted from Tony Robbins' new book, Money Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom. http://www.entrepreneur.com/

50 Principles
1.     Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m possible”! —Audrey Hepburn
2.     I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. —Maya Angelou
3.     Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. —Henry Ford
4.     Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence. —Vince Lombardi
5.     Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. —Charles Swindoll
6.     If you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough. —Oprah Winfrey
7.     Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent. —Eleanor Roosevelt
8.     I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination. —Jimmy Dean
9.     Believe you can and you’re halfway there. —Theodore Roosevelt
10. To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart. —Eleanor Roosevelt
11. Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears. —Les Brown
12. Do or do not. There is no try. —Yoda
13. Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve. —Napoleon Hill
14. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do, so throw off the bowlines, sail away from safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore, Dream, Discover. —Mark Twain
15. I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. —Michael Jordan
16. Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value. —Albert Einstein
17. I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions. —Stephen Covey
18. When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. —Henry Ford
19. The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any. —Alice Walker
20. The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. —Amelia Earhart
21. It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. —Aristotle Onassis
22. Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. —Robert Louis Stevenson
23. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. —Steve Jobs
24. Change your thoughts and you change your world. —Norman Vincent Peale
25. The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. —Ayn Rand
26. If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. —Vincent Van Gogh
27. Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs. —Farrah Gray
28. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. —Dalai Lama
29. You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have. —Maya Angelou
30. I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear. —Rosa Parks
31. I would rather die of passion than of boredom. —Vincent van Gogh
32. A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty. —Unknown
33. A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.——Albert Einstein
34. What’s money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. —Bob Dylan
35. I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do. —Leonardo da Vinci
36. If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else. —Booker T. Washington
37. Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations, our possibilities become limitless. —Jamie Paolinetti
38. If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat! Just get on. —Sheryl Sandberg
39. Certain things catch your eye, but pursue only those that capture the heart. —Ancient Indian Proverb
40. When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. —Helen Keller
41. Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see. —Confucius
42. How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world. —Anne Frank
43. When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down “happy”. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life. —John Lennon
44. The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. —Ralph Waldo Emerson
45. We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone. —Ronald Reagan
46. Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear. —George Addair
47. We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. —Plato
48. Nothing will work unless you do. —Maya Angelou
49. I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the water to create many ripples. —Mother Teresa
50. What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality. —Plutarch
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Personality Development Philosophy Attitude Life Lessons 
The cockroach theory for self development
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At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady.
She started screaming out of fear.
With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.
Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.
The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.
Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.
The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.
In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.
The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt.
When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.
Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior?
If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?
He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.
It is not the cockroach, but the inability of those people to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach, that disturbed the ladies.
I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.
It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.
More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.
Lessons learnt from the story:
I understood, I should not react in life.
I should always respond.
The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.
Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of.
A beautiful way to understand............LIFE.
Person who is HAPPY is not because Everything is RIGHT in his Life..
He is HAPPY because his Attitude towards Everything in his Life is Right..!!
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Japanse Fish Story for being constantly challenged
The Japanese have always loved fresh fish.
But the water close to Japan has not held many fish for decades. So to feed the Japanese population, fishing boats got bigger and went farther than ever.
The further the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring the fish. If the return trip took more time, the fish were not fresh. To solve this problem, fish companies installed freezers on their boats.
They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer. However, the Japanese could taste the difference between fresh and frozen fish and they did not like the taste of frozen fish
The frozen fish fetched a lower price.
So, fishing companies installed fish tanks. They would catch the fish and stuff them in the tanks, fin to fin. After a little thrashing around, they were tired, dull, and lost their fresh-fish taste.
The fishing industry faced an impending crisis! But today, they get fresh-tasting fish to Japan.
How did they manage...?
To keep the fish tasting fresh, the Japanese fishing companies still put the fish in the tanks but with a small shark.The fish are challenged and hence are constantly on the move.
The challenge they face keeps them alive and fresh!
Have you realized that some of us are also living in a pond but most of the time tired and dull....?
Basically in our lives, sharks are new challenges to keep us active. If you are steadily conquering challenges, you are happy.
Your challenges keep you energized. Don’t create Success and revel in it in a state of inertia. You have the resources, skills and abilities to make a difference.
Put a shark in your tank this year and see how far you can really go. Challenge your Self!.

Baby Giraffe Story

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Sand and Rock

A professor of philosophy stood before his class with some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks about two inches in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was full.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly and watched as the pebbles rolled into the open areas between the rocks. The professor then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They chuckled and agreed that it was indeed full this time.
The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. The sand filled the remaining open areas of the jar. "Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize that this jar signifies your life. The rocks are the truly important things, such as family, health and relationships. If all else was lost and only the rocks remained, your life would still be meaningful. The pebbles are the other things that matter in your life, such as work or school. The sand signifies the remaining "small stuff" and material possessions.
If you put sand into the jar first, there is no room for the rocks or the pebbles. The same can be applied to your lives. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are truly important.
Pay attention to the things in life that are critical to your happiness and well-being. Take time to get medical check-ups, play with your children, go for a run, write your grandmother a letter. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, or fix the disposal.
Take care of the rocks first – things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just pebbles and sand.
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Rat Hope Experiment


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During a brutal study at Harvard in the 1950s, Dr. Curt Richter placed rats in a pool of water to test how long they could tread water. 

On average they'd give up and sink after 15 minutes. 

But right before they gave up due to exhaustion, the researchers would pluck them out, dry them off, let them rest for a few minutes - and put them back in for a second round.

In this second try - how long do you think they lasted?

Remember - they had just swam until failure only a few short minutes ago...

How long do you think?

Another 15 minutes?
10 minutes?
5 minutes?

No!

60 hours!

That's not an error. 

That's right! 60 hours of swimming.

The conclusion drawn was that since the rats BELIEVED that they would eventually be rescued, they could push their bodies way past what they previously thought possible. 

I will leave you with this thought:

If hope can cause exhausted rats to swim for that long, what could a belief in yourself and your abilities, do for you?


FERN VS BAMBOO

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Donot jump to conclusion
A 24 year boy seeing out from the train window and shouted, "Dad , look the trees are going behind" Dad smiled. A young couple sitting nearby, looked at the 24 year old's childish behavior with pity. Suddenly he again said, "Dad, look the clouds are running with us!!"

The couple Couldn’t resist and said to the old man, "Why don’t you take your son to a good doctor?" The old man smiled and said, "I did it & we are just coming from the hospital, my son was blind from birth, he just got his eyes today".

PUT THEM DOWN
Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see & asked the students,
"How much do you think this glass weighs?"
'50gms!’..... '100gms!' .....'125gms' ...the students answered.
"I really don't know unless I weigh it," said the professor, "but, my question is:
What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?"
‘Nothing’...the students said.
'Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?' the professor asked.
'Your arm would begin to ache' said one of the students
"You're right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?"
"Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!"
.. ventured another student & all the students laughed
"Very good.”
But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?"
asked the professor.
'No'. Was the answer.
"Then what caused the arm ache & the muscle stress?"
The students were puzzled.
"What should I do now to come out of pain?" asked professor again.
"Put the glass down!" said one of the students
"Exactly!" said the professor.
Life's problems are something like this.
Hold it for a few minutes in your head & they seem OK.
Think of them for a long time & they begin to ache.
Hold it even longer & they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.
It's important to think of the challenges or problems in your life,
But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT is to 'PUT THEM DOWN' at the end of every day before you go to sleep.

That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh &strong & can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

My wife has a hearing problem
A old man thinks his wife is losing her hearing. He calls the doctor about it and the doctor says he can do a little experiment to determine the severity, "Ask her a question from the next room in a normal tone of voice, and keep asking while coming closer until she can hear you. That way you know the range of her hearing."
That night, he's sitting on his easy chair in the living room while his wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner. He estimates he's about 30 feet away. In a normal tone of voice, he says, "What's for dinner?"
She doesn't respond, so he gets up and walks to the kitchen doorway, about 20 feet away, and asks, "What's for dinner?"
She still doesn't respond so he walks 10 feet closer and asks, "What's for dinner?"
She still doesn't say anything, so he gets right up beside her and asks, "What's for dinner?"

She says, "For the fourth damn time we're having chicken!"

  This Too Shall Pass 
Once a king called upon all of his wise men and asked them,” Is there a mantra or suggestion which works in every situation, in every circumstance, in every place and in every time. In every joy, every sorrow, every defeat and every victory? One answer for all questions? Something which can help me when none of you is available to advise me? Tell me is there any mantra?”

All the wise men were puzzled by the King’s question. They thought and thought. After a lengthy discussion, an old man suggested something which appealed to all of them. They went to the king and gave him something written on paper, with a condition that the king was not to see it out of curiosity.
Only in extreme danger, when the King finds himself alone and there seems to be no way, only then he can see it. The King put the papers under his Diamond ring.

Sometime later, the neighbors attacked the Kingdom. King and his army fought bravely but lost the battle. The King had to flee on his horse. The enemies were following him getting closer and closer. Suddenly the King found himself standing at the end of the road - that road was not going anywhere. Underneath there was a rocky valley thousand feet deep. If he jumped into it, he would be finished…and he could not return because it was a small road…the sound of enemy’s horses was approaching fast. The King became restless. There seemed to be no way.

Then suddenly he saw the Diamond in his ring shining in the sun, and he remembered the message hidden in the ring. He opened the diamond and read the message. The message was -” THIS TOO SHALL PASS”
The King read it. Again read it. Suddenly something struck him- Yes! This too will pass. Only a few days ago, I was enjoying my kingdom. I was the mightiest of all the Kings. Yet today, the Kingdom and all his pleasure have gone. I am here trying to escape from enemies. Like those days of luxuries have gone, this day of danger too will pass. A calm came on his face. He kept standing there. The place where he was standing was full of natural beauty. He had never known that such a beautiful place was also a part of his Kingdom.

The revelation of the message had a great effect on him. He relaxed and forgot about those following him. After a few minutes he realized that the noise of the horses and the enemy coming was receding. They moved into some other part of the mountains and were near him.
The King was very brave. He reorganized his army and fought again. He defeated the enemy and regained his empire. When he returned to his empire after victory, he was received with much fanfare. The whole capital was rejoicing in the victory.

Everyone was in a festive mood. Flowers were being showered on King from every house, from every corner. People were dancing and singing. For a moment King said to himself,” I am one of the bravest and greatest King. It is not easy to defeat me. With all the reception and celebration he saw an ego emerging in him.
Suddenly the Diamond of his ring flashed in the sunlight and reminded him of the message. He opened it and read it again: “THIS TOO SHALL PASS”.
He became silent. His face went through a total change - from the egoist he moved to a state of utter humbleness. If this too is going to pass, it is not yours. The defeat was not yours, the victory is not yours. You are just a watcher. Everything passes by. We are witnesses of all this. We are the perceivers. Life comes and goes. Happiness comes and goes. Sorrow comes and goes.
Now as you have read this story, just sit silently and evaluate your own life. This too will pass. Think of the moments of joy and victory in your life. Think of the moment of Sorrow and defeat. Are they permanent? They all come and pass away.

Life just passes away. There is nothing permanent in this world. Everything changes except the law of change. Think over it from your own perspective. You have seen all the changes. You have survived all setbacks, all defeats and all sorrows. All have passed away. The problems in the present, they too will pass away, because nothing remains forever. Joy and sorrow are the two faces of the same coin. They both will pass away.
You are just a witness of change. Experience it, understand it, and enjoy the present moment - this too shall pass!

17 Camal story - Problem Solving

A father left 17 Camels as an Asset for his Three Sons.

When the Father passed away, his sons opened up the will.

The Will of the Father stated that the Eldest son should get Half of 17 Camels,

The Middle Son should be given 1/3rd of 17 Camels,

Youngest Son should be given 1/9th of the 17 Camels,

As it is not possible to divide 17 into half or 17 by 3 or 17 by 9, the sons started to fight with each other.

So, they decided to go to a wise man.

The wise man listened patiently about the Will. The wise man, after giving this thought, brought one camel of his own & added the same to 17. That increased the total to 18 camels.

Now, he started reading the deceased father’s will.

Half of 18 = 9.
So he gave 9 camels
to the eldest son.

1/3rd of 18 = 6.
So he gave 6 camels
to the middle son.

1/9th of 18 = 2.
So he gave 2 camels
to the youngest son.

Now add this up:
9 + 6 + 2 = 17 &
This leaves 1 camel,
which the wise man took back.

MORAL: The attitude of negotiation & problem solving is to find the 18th camel i.e. the common ground. Once a person is able to find the common ground, the issue is resolved. It is difficult at times.

However, to reach a solution, the first step is to believe that there is a solution. If we think that there is no solution, we won’t be able to reach any!

If you liked this story,  please share with all. You might spark a thought, inspire & possibly change a life forever!
  
Frog in boiling water Story
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Remind yourself that you are too smart to be complacent about a steadily deteriorating situation.

If you drop a frog into boiling water, it immediately jumps out (or so the story goes). However, if you put a frog in a pot of room-temperature water, and then bring the water to a boil very, very slowly, the frog will stay in the water until it dies. It's an apt metaphor for how people sometimes deal with slowly deteriorating situations.

When we are confronted with an abrupt negative change, we tend to react immediately and decisively. Coming in contact with a flame will cause us to pull away instantly to avoid getting burned. We don't think about it; we just react. Yet we will sit in the sun for hours and get badly burned. We know full well that we're getting burned, but we tend to sit there anyway, because there is no instantaneous sensation to trigger a decision to get out of harm's way.

It's this absence of decision triggers that causes people to miss opportunities or to get into trouble that could have been avoided. Fortunately, being smarter than frogs, we have the ability to create decision triggers for our own good. If we're sunbathing, for example, we might place an alarm clock deliberately out of reach and set it to go off every half hour. When it goes off, we have to get up, go over to it, and turn it off. This triggers a decision: "Should I expose myself to another half hour of sun, or have I had enough?" Without the clock, deliberately placed at an inconvenient distance and annoying us every 30 minutes, we are likely to keep telling ourselves, "Just a few minutes more," and then a few minutes more after that, and so on, until it's too late. The "time to get out of the sun" decision trigger arrives the following morning when we turn over in bed and wince in pain. By then, it's too late to avoid the trouble.

The frog-in-boiling-water syndrome, as I like to call it, can arise in other, more serious, situations throughout our lives where we willfully ignore an increasingly dangerous situation, telling ourselves that we'll do something about it "soon."

Take putting on weight as an example. Nobody decides to get fat, yet many people will just keep putting on more and more weight without doing anything about it. They keep telling themselves, "I'm going to lose some weight soon." Similarly, people don't make a conscious decision to keep smoking until they get lung cancer. They tell themselves, "I can stop anytime, and I will, but another day, or week, or month won't matter." So they remain like the frog in the pot, slowly burning up their lungs.

The frog-in-boiling-water syndrome doesn't apply just to self-destructive behaviors. It can trap people facing important career decisions. This is the case for people who stubbornly remain in a job or occupation that isn't satisfying or isn't offering sufficient opportunities. Like the simmering frog, they stay where they are, telling themselves that things might improve while knowing they won't, instead of changing employers or acquiring new professional skills. They may complain about the situation to others, but they never do anything about it until they find themselves trapped in a miserable, dead-end job, or worse, they lose their job without any updated skills to go forward in a more successful direction.

People stuck in deteriorating or stagnating relationships also fall prey to the frog-in-boiling-water syndrome. They are unhappy, but they just go on being unhappy without deciding to do anything to improve the relationship or to get out of it. Just like the frog, they stay where they are as the water slowly reaches the boiling point.
This syndrome can also trap people who are not in a relationship but would like to be. They do not take any action to help themselves meet someone, and the years pass. Slowly they lose their "window of opportunity" to meet a person who might become a lifetime partner.

Some people even believe that the frog-in-boiling-water syndrome applies to the way a society can ignore critical decisions. For example, we may be gradually depleting our limited resources without making any conscious decisions about replenishing them or slowing the depletion. Instead, we're letting the situation boil away until it becomes too late to preserve a sustainable environment. We may be creating global warming, yet we ignore or reject any solutions until our polar ice caps melt away and we find our coastlines submerged. Likewise, as the economic gap between the lower and upper classes increases, we do nothing to avert the inevitable ramifications from such a gap. We sit in the water of our own apathy and denial without taking action.

Don't be like our friend the simmering frog. You are smarter than the frog. Step back from time to time and take stock of situations in your life such as your health, your relationships, your career or job, your business and your investments. Do this regularly. You might take stock on New Year's Day, your birthday, or every three months. Set that alarm clock, and put it someplace where you'll have to get up and go over to turn it off. Remind yourself that you are too smart to be complacent about a steadily deteriorating situation.

Moreover, if you think a friend is falling into the boiling-frog syndrome, share this story. It might save a life.
PS : In real life frogs do actually try to jump out.This is only a anecdote


Deaf Frog story - Ignore the Crowd

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. When the other frogs saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died. The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time. This story teaches two lessons: 1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day. 2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them.
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Shake it off like a donkey
One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey.
He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement he quieted down.
A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.
As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up.
Pretty soon, Everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!
MORAL :Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

COURAGE

How to stay motivated ?

In the jungle which animal is the biggest ........

I heard you say, Elephant.

In the jungle which animal is the tallest ........

I heard you say, Giraffe.

In the jungle which animal is the wisest ........

I heard you say, Fox.

In the jungle which animal is the fastest ........

I heard you say, Cheetahs.

Among all these wonderful qualities mentioned, where is the Lion in the picture.?

Yet, you say the Lion is the KING of the jungle even without ANY of these qualities.!!

Why??

Because...

The Lion is courageous,

The Lion is very bold,

The Lion is always ready to face any challenges, any barrier that crosses his path, no matter how big/bad they are.!!

The Lion walks with confidence. The Lion dares anything and is never afraid. The Lion believes he is unstoppable. The Lion is a risk taker. The Lion believes any animal is food for him. The Lion believes any opportunity is worth giving a try and never lets it slip from his hands. The Lion has charisma.!!

So...

- What is it that we get to learn from the Lion ??

• You don't need to be the fastest.

• You don't need to be the wisest.

• You don't need to be the smartest.

• You don't need to be the most brilliant.

• You don't need to be generally accepted to achieve your dreams and be great in life.!!

• All you need is *courage*

• All you need is the will to try.

• All you need is the faith to believe it is possible.

• All you need is to believe in yourself, that *you can* do it.!!

It's TIME to bring out the Lion in you..!!

Stay motivated.

"Face the terrible, face it boldly" - Swami Vivekananda.

Paradigm Shift

Imagine you're in Hyderabad's Rajiv Gandhi International Airport . While you're waiting for your flight, you notice a kiosk selling shortbread cookies. You buy a box, put them in your traveling bag and then you patiently search for an available seat so you can sit down and enjoy your cookies.Finally you find a seat next to a gentleman. You reach down into your traveling bag and pull out your box of shortbread cookies.

 As you do so, you notice that the gentleman starts watching you intensely.He stares as you open the box and his eyes follow your hand as you pick up the cookie and bring it to your mouth. Just then he reaches over and takes one of your cookies from the box,  and eats it! You're more than a little surprised at this. Actually,  you're at a loss for words. Not only does he take one cookie, but he  alternates with you. For every one cookie you take, he takes one.

Now, what's your immediate impression of this guy? Crazy? Greedy? He's got some nerve?! Can you imagine the words you might use to describe this man to your associates back at the office? Meanwhile, you both continue eating the cookies until there's just one left. To your surprise, the man reaches over and takes it. But then he does something unexpected. He breaks it in half, and gives half to you. After he's finished with his half he gets up, and without a word, he leaves.

You think to yourself, "Did this really happen?" You're left sitting there dumbfounded and still hungry. So you go back to the kiosk and buy another box of cookies. You then return to your seat and begin opening your new box of cookies when you glance down into your traveling bag. Sitting there in your bag is your original box of ookies -- still unopened.

Only then do you realize that when you reached down earlier, you had reached into the other man's bag, and grabbed his box of cookies by mistake. Now what do you think of the man? Generous? Tolerant? You've just experienced a profound paradigm shift. You're seeing things from a new point of view.

Every Person is valuable
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A man went to God and asked, "What's the value of life?"
God gave him one stone and said, "Find out the value of this stone, but don't sell it."
The man took the stone to an Orange Seller and asked him what it's cost would be.
The Orange Seller saw the shiny stone and said, "You can take 12 oranges and give me the stone."
The man apologized and said that the God has asked him not to sell it.
He went ahead and found a vegetable seller. "What could be the value of this stone?" he asked the vegetable seller. The seller saw the shiny stone and said, "Take one sack of potatoes and give me the stone."
The man again apologized and said he can't sell it.
Further ahead, he went into a jewellery shop and asked the value of the stone.
The jeweler saw the stone under a lens and said, "I'll give you 50 Lakhs for this stone." When the man shook his head, the jeweler said, "Alright, alright, take 2 crores, but give me the stone." 
The man explained that he can't sell the stone. Further ahead, the man saw a precious stone's shop and asked the seller the value of this stone.
When the precious stone's seller saw the big ruby, he lay down a red cloth and put the ruby on it. Then he walked in circles around the ruby and bent down and touched his head in front of the ruby.
"From where did you bring this priceless ruby from?" he asked. "Even if I sell the whole world, and my life, I won't be able to purchase this priceless stone.
Stunned and confused, the man returned to the God and told him what had happened. "Now tell me what is the value of life, God?
God said, "The answers you got from the Orange Seller, the Vegetable Seller, the Jeweler & the Precious Stone's Seller explain the value of our life... You may be a precious stone, even priceless, but people may value you based on their level of information, their belief in you, their motive behind entertaining you, their ambition, and their risk taking ability. But don't fear, you will surely find someone who will discern your true value."
In the eyes of God you are very very precious. Respect yourself. You are Unique. No one can Replace you!

Alexander The Great
There is very instructive incident involving the life of Alexander, the great Macedonian king. Alexander, after conquering many kingdoms, was returning home. On the way, he fell ill and it took him to his death bed. With death staring him in his face, Alexander realized how his conquests, his great army, his sharp sword and all his wealth were of no consequence.
He now longed to reach home to see his mother's face and bid her his last adieu. But, he had to accept the fact that his sinking health would not permit him to reach his distant homeland. So, the mighty conqueror lay prostrate and pale, helplessly waiting to breathe his last. He called his generals and said, "I will depart from this world soon, I have three wishes, please carry them out without fail." With tears flowing down their cheeks, the generals agreed to abide by their king's last wishes.
"My first desire is that," said Alexander, "My physicians alone must carry my coffin." After a pause, he continued, "Secondly, I desire that when my coffin is being carried to the grave, the path leading to the graveyard be strewn with gold, silver and precious stones which I have collected in my treasury.
"The king felt exhausted after saying this. He took a minute's rest and continued. "My third and last wish is that both my hands be kept dangling out of my coffin."The people who had gathered there wondered at the king's strange wishes. But no one dare bring the question to their lips.
Alexander's favorite general kissed his hand and pressed them to his heart. "O king, we assure you that your wishes will all be fulfilled. But tell us why do you make such strange wishes?"
At this Alexander took a deep breath and said: "I would like the world to know of the three lessons I have just learnt. I want my physicians to carry my coffin because people should realize that no doctor can really cure any body. They are powerless and cannot save a person from the clutches of death. So let not people take life for granted.
The second wish of strewing gold, silver and other riches on the way to the graveyard is to tell People that not even a fraction of gold will come with me. I spent all my life earning riches but cannot take anything with me. Let people realize that it is a sheer waste of time to chase wealth.
And about my third wish of having my hands dangling out of the coffin, I wish people to know that I came empty handed into this world and empty handed I go out of this world."
Alexander's last words:  "Bury my body, do not build any monument, keep my hands outside so that the world knows the person who won the world had nothing in his hands when dying".
With these words, the king closed his eyes. Soon he let death conquer him and breathed his last.

Entitlement Mentality

One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big
company.
He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.
The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all
the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research,never had a year when he
did not score.
The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none".
The director asked," Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth
answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my
school fees.
The director asked," Where did your mother work?" The youth answered,"My mother worked as
clothes cleaner.The director requested the youth to show his hands.The youth showed a pair of
hands that were smooth and perfect.
The director asked," Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth
answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore,
my mother can wash clothes faster than me.
The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's
hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.*
The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily
requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed
feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.
The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he
noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands.
Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.
This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes
everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price
that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.
After finishing the cleaning of his mother's hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining
clothes for his mother.
That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.
Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.
The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done
and learned yesterday in your house?"
The youth answered," I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining
clothes'
The Director asked," please tell me your feelings."
The youth said, Number 1,I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not
the successful me today.Number 2,by working together and helping my mother, only I now
realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.Number 3, I have come to appreciate
the importance and value of family relationship.
The director said, " This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person
who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things
done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.
Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates.
Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved
tremendously.
A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop
"entitlement mentality" and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent's
efforts.
When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes
a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame
others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while,
but eventually would not feel sense of achievement.He will grumble and be full of hatred and
fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we
destroying the kid instead?*
You can let your kid live in a big house, give him a Driver & Car for going around, Eat a Good
Meal, learn Piano, Watch a Big Screen TV. But when you are Cutting Grass, please let them
experience it. After a Meal, let them Wash their Plates and Bowls together with their Brothers
and Sisters. Tell them to Travel in Public Bus, It is not because you do not have Money for Car
or to Hire a Maid, but it is because you want to Love them in a right way. You want them to
understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will Grow Grey, same as the
Mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the
effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things
done. 
Joining the club of 99

One day the King came upon a Servant who was singing happily while he worked. This fascinated the King; why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy. The King asked the Servant, "Why are you so happy? The Servant replied, "Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don't need too much - just a Roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies." The King was not satisfied with that reply. Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted Advisor. After hearing the King's woes and the Servant's story, the Advisor said, "Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club." "The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?" the King enquired. The Advisor replied, "Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is place 99 Gold Coins in a bag and leave it at this Servant's doorstep." Whenthe servant saw the bag, he took it into his house. When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy... so many Gold Coins! He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 Coins. He wondered, "What could've happened to that last Gold Coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 Coins!" He looked everywhere he could, but that final Coin was elusive. Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that Gold Coin and complete his collection. From that day, the servant's life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th Gold Coin. He stopped singing while he worked. Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled.. When he sought his Advisor's help, the Advisor said, "Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club." He continued, "The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never contented, because they're always yearning and striving for that extra "1" telling to themselves: "Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life. We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we're given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us; all these as a price for our growing needs and desires. That's what joining the 99 Club is all about."
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wow attitude

Last spring I was walking in a park. A short distance ahead of me was a mom and her three-year-old daughter.

 The little girl was holding on to a string that was attached to a helium balloon.

All of a sudden, a sharp gust of wind took the balloon from the little girl. I braced myself for some screaming and crying.

But, no! As the little girl turned to watch her balloon go skyward, she gleefully shouted out, "Wow!"

I didn't realize it at that moment, but that little girl taught me something.

Later that day, I received a phone call from a person with news of an unexpected problem. I felt like responding with "Oh no, what should we do?" But remembering that little girl, I found myself saying, "Wow, that's interesting! How can I help you?"

One thing's for sure - life's always going to keep us off balance with its unexpected problems. That's a given. What's not preordained is our response. We can choose to be frustrated or fascinated.

No matter what the situation, a fascinated "Wow!" will always beat a frustrated "Oh, no."
So the next time you experience one of life's unexpected gusts, remember that little girl and make it a "Wow!" experience. The "Wow!" response always works

Why do people shout when angry

A saint was walking along the river Ganges when he noticed some family members shouting at each other. He smiled and asked his disciples, "Why do people shout when angry?"
The disciples thought for some time. Some said "because they lose their temper and calm", others said "that they want to stress upon their views" and so on. The saint was obviously not satisfied. Finally, he explained them the reason, "When two people are in love, they talk softly with each other. What happens when the love increases much more? They start whispering. And then comes a point, when they only have to look into each other's eyes to convey their thoughts. Now can you guess the answer?"
The disciples were still confused. So he continued, "when two people become angry, the distance between their hearts increases. To cover this distance, they need to shout so that they can hear each other. The more the anger, the greater the distance and hence more the shouting."

This is what happens. So when you become angry, don't let your heart create distance from the other person, because some day it might happen that the distance increases so much that it would be impossible to bridge it.


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second chance
It's another morning..
..  Again I have to go to office..
Ohh, this is me… I shouted having a glance on my snap in today's news paper.
But what the HELL it is doing in the death column??
Strange
One sec... Let me think, last night when I was going to bed I had a severe pain in my chest, but I don't remember anything after that, I think I had a sound sleep.
Its morning now, ohh….. It's already 10:00 AM, where is my coffee?
I will be late for office and my boss will get a chance to irritate me.
Where is everyone…??? I screamed.
"I think there is a crowed outside my room, let me check." I said to myself.
So many people….. Not all of them crying…
But why some of them crying
WHAT IS THIS??? I m laying there on the floor
"I AM HERE" … I shouted!!! No one listen.
"LOOK I AM NOT DEAD" … I screamed once again!!! No one is interested in me.
They all were looking me on the bed.
I went back to my bed room.
"Am I dead??"  I asked myself.
Where is my wife, my children, my mom-DAD, my friends?

I found them in the next room, all of them were crying… still trying to console each other.
My wife was crying… she was really looking sad.
My little kid was not sure what happened, but she was crying just coz her mom was sad.
How can I go without saying my kid that I really love her, I really do care of her. ??
How can I go without saying my wife that she is really most beautiful and most caring wife in this world..??
How can I go without saying my parents that I m … just because of u ??
How can I go without telling my friends that without them perhaps I have done most of the wrong things in my life… thanks for being there always when I need them… and sorry for not being there when they really need me..
I can see a person standing in the corner and trying to hide his tears
Ohh… he was once my best friend, but a small misunderstanding made us part, and we both have strong enough ego to keep us disconnect.
I went there.. And offered him my hand, "Dear friend… I just want to say sorry for everything, we r still best friends, please forgive me."
No response from other side, what the hell?? He is still preserving his ego, I am saying sorry… even then!!!
I really don't care for such people.

But one sec…. it seems he is not able to see me!!!! He did not see my extended hand.
My goodness…  AM I REALLY DEAD???
I just sat down near ME; I was also feeling like crying
"OHH ALMIGHTY!!!! PLEASE JUST GIVE ME FEW MORE DAYS…"
I just wasn't to make my wife, my parents; my friends realize that how much I love them.
My wife entered in the room, she looks beautiful.
"YOU R BEAUTIFUL" I shouted.
She didn't hear my words, in fact she never heard these words coz I never said this to her.
"GOD!!!!" I screamed… a little more time plzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..
I cried
One more chance please… to hug my child, to make my mom smile just once, to feel my dad proud on me at least for a moment, to say sorry to my friends for everything I have not given to them, and thanks for still being in my life….
Then I looked up and cried!!!!
I shouted….
"GOD!!!! ONE MORE CHANCE PLEASE!!!!"
"You shouted in your sleep," said my wife as she gently woke me up. "Did you have a nightmare?"
I was sleeping….
Ohh that was just a dream….
My wife was there… she can hear me…
This is the happiest moment of my life
I hugged her and whispered…. "U R THE MOST BEAUTIFUL AND CARING WIFE IN THIS UNIVERSE….. I REALLY LOVE U DEAR"
I can't understand the reason of the smile on her face with some tears in her eyes, still I m happy…. :)

 "THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS SECOND? CHANCE.."



Fence or Bridge
Once upon a time two brothers, who lived on adjoining farms, fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machinery, and trading labor and goods as needed without a conflict. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding and it grew into a major difference, and finally it exploded into an exchange of bitter words followed by weeks of silence. One morning there was a knock on the older brother's door. He opened it to find a man with a carpenter's tool box. "I'm looking for a few days' work." – he said. "Perhaps you would have a few small jobs here and there I could help with?" "Yes." – said the older brother. "I do have a job for you. Look across the creek at that farm. That's my neighbor; in fact, it's my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to the river levee and now there is a creek between us. Well, he may have done this to spite me, but I'll do him one better." "See that pile of lumber by the barn? I want you to build me a fence –an 8-foot fence — so I won't need to see his place or his face anymore." 

The carpenter said, "I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I'll be able to do a job that pleases you." The older brother had to go to town, so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. The carpenter worked hard all that day measuring, sawing, nailing. About sunset when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his job. The farmer's eyes opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge — a bridge stretching from one side of the creek to the other! A fine piece of work, handrails and all — and the neighbor, his younger brother, was coming toward them, his arms outstretched — "You are quite a fellow to build this bridge after all I've said and done." The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, taking each other's hand. They turned to see the carpenter hoist his toolbox onto his shoulder. "No, wait! Stay a few days. I've a lot of other projects for you," said the older brother. "I'd love to stay on," the carpenter said, "but I have many more bridges to build."

Out of the box thinking : Similarities in Distinct Domains

Akbar was a pathfinder The enemy army was almost at the gates. The city would surely fall. The only solution was to get Akbar to lead his soldiers. Mansingh ran into the palace to fetch the emperor and found Akbar in the garden listening to Tansen. Birbal stopped Mansingh from entering the garden. The emperor did not want to be disturbed. Tansen's song ended. 

Akbar asked him to sing another song. An impatient Mansingh said, "The city is on the verge of being destroyed and he is listening to music ! What's wrong with him." Birbal retorted, "He is not listening to music. He is figuring out battle strategies." Mansingh retorted, "What nonsense, all I can hear is the notes of Tansen's wonderful voice. No strategies there." Birbal laughed, "That is why you are merely a commander and Akbar is the emperor."
Wisdom comes from the oddest of places. Ideas can come from anywhere. The difference between a pathfinder and a follower is the pathfinder's ability to see similarities between even the most distinct domains - music and battle strategies, for example. Followers are unable to understand the underlying principle and so need clear domain-specific examples.
When Michael moved to Mumbai to take up a job at a pharmaceutical company, he realised that rules that worked back home in Germany would not work in India. When asked why, he said, "Oh, just look at how Indians eat!" Nobody understood. He explained, "In Germany, a proper meal is a course meal: soup, starter, main course and dessert. You eat what the chef cooks. But in India, a proper meal is a thali: all dishes are served simultaneously, the sweet and the sour and the pungent and the crispy. Everyone mixes and matches the food differently.
So what one person puts in his mouth is very different from what another person puts in his mouth. This is the ultimate in customisation. A culture like this would not be comfortable with rules. People here would always like to bend the rules to their convenience, unlike Germany, where we enjoy following rules. I have to work harder here to get everyone to align and comply." Unlike most expats, Michael figured out a way to work with his Indian colleagues without being autocratic or authoritarian. He was wise enough to see common patterns between office behaviour and the way we eat food - a true hallmark of a pathfinder.
During interviews, Narendra would ask the interviewees about Bollywood. As they spoke, he would see how they analysed the plots and the characters and the stars and by that he would be able to figure out how their mind functioned. Did they think originally? Did they follow the trend? Were they trend followers or trendsetters? Were they open to suggestion? Were they opinionated? Were they arrogant? The study of principles that are not impacted by the domain is known as tattva-gyan.

[
devdutt@devdutt.com]


Out of Box Thinking at Work Place
  • Employee "A" in a company walked up to his manager and asked what my job is for the day?
  • The manager took "A" to the bank of a river and asked him to cross the river and reach the other side of the bank.
  • "A" completed this task successfully and reported back to the manager about the completion of the task assigned. The manager smiled and said "GOOD JOB"
Next day Employee "B" reported to the same manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task as above to this person also.
  • The Employee "B' before starting the task saw Employee "C" struggling in the river to reach the other side of the bank. He realized "C" has the same task.
  • Now "B" not only crossed the river but also helped "C" to cross the river.
  • "B" reported back to the manager and the manager smiled and said "VERY GOOD JOB"
The following day Employee "Q" reported to the same manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task again.
  • Employee "Q" before starting the work did some home work and realized "A",      "B" & "C" all has done this task before. He met them and understood how they performed.
  • He realized that there is a need for a guide and training for doing this task.
  • He sat first and wrote down the procedure for crossing the river, he documented the common mistakes people made, and tricks to do the task efficiently and effortlessly.
  • Using the methodology he had written down he crossed the river and reported back to the manager along with documented procedure and training material.
  • The manger said "Q" you have done an "EXCELLENT JOB".
The following day Employee "O' reported to the manager and asked him the job for the day. The manager assigned the same task again.

"O" studied the procedure written down by "Q" and sat and thought about the whole task.
He realized company is spending lot of money in getting this task completed. He decided not to cross the river, but sat and designed and implemented a bridge across the river and went back to his manager and said, "You no longer need to assign this task to any one".
The manager smiled and said "Outstanding job 'O'. I am very proud of you."
What is the difference between A, B, Q & O????????
Many a times in life we get tasks to be done at home, at office, at play….,
Most of us end up doing what is expected out of us. Do we feel happy? Most probably yes. We would be often disappointed when the recognition is not meeting our expectation.

Let us compare ourselves with "B". Helping some one else the problem often improves our own skills. There is an old proverb (I do not know the author) "learn to teach and teach to learn". From a company point of view "B" has demonstrated much better skills than "A" since one more task for the company is completed.

"Q" created knowledge base for the team. More often than not, we do the task assigned to us without checking history. Learning from other's mistake is the best way to improve efficiency. This knowledge creation for the team is of immense help. Re-usability reduces cost there by increases productivity of the team. "Q" demonstrated good "team-player" skills,

Now to the outstanding person, "O" made the task irrelevant; he created a Permanent Asset to the team.
If you notice B, Q and O all have demonstrated "team performance" over an above individual performance; also they have demonstrated a very invaluable characteristic known as "INITIATIVE".

Initiative pays of every where whether at work or at personal life. If you put initiative you will succeed. Initiative is a continual process and it never ends. This is because this year's achievement is next year's task. You cannot use the same success story every year.
The story provides an instance of performance, where as measurement needs to be spread across at least 6-12 months. Consequently performance should be consistent and evenly spread.
Out-of-Box thinkers are always premium and that is what every one constantly looks out for. Initiative, Out-of-Box thinking and commitment are the stepping stone to success.
Initiative should be life long. Think of out of the box.


How you deal adversity- ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed that as one problem was solved, a new one arose. 

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word. 

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She then pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. 

Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me, what do you see?" 

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied. 

She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. 

The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, Mother?" 

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity -- boiling water -- but each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water. 

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?" 

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity? Do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength? 

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart? 

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor of your life. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate to another level? 

How do you handle adversity? Are you changed by your surroundings or do you bring life, flavor, to them? 

ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN?



Be Sure there is a problem before you start fearing about it and start working on a solution


One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus,and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a
few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a Pathan got on. Six feet four, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He
glared at the conductor and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!" and sat down at the back.

Conductor didn't argue with Pathan, but he wasn't happy about it. The next day the same thing happened . Pathan got on again, made a show of
refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Pathan was taking advantage of poor conductor. Finally he could stand
it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo,and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what's more, he felt really good about himself. So, on the next Monday, when Pathan once again got on the bus and said, "Pathan doesn't pay!"

The driver stood up, glared back at Pathan, and screamed, "And why not?"

With a surprised look on his face, Pathan replied, "Pathan has a bus pass."

Management Lesson: Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one.



FIVE LESSONS TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT - THE WAY WE TREAT PEOPLE.

1. First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:  "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor.
"In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2. Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an elderly African-American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her; generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read:
"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night.  The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others." Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole

3. Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.
"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.
"Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.
"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.
By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient.
"Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.
The little boy again counted his coins.
"I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.
The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.
When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table.
There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

 4. Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand!
Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5. Fifth Important Lesson - Giving ‘When it Counts’...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek.
Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away". Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.


Ten thoughts to fine tune your attitude

Read on, take time to understand it, make the effort to apply it and it will indeed
change your Attitude for the better.

0.Heavy rains remind us of challenges in life. Never ask for a lighter
rain. Just pray for a better umbrella. That is attitude.

1.When flood comes, fish eat ants & when flood recedes, ants eat fish.
Only time matters.Just hold on, God gives opportunity to everyone!

2.Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right
relationship,It's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we
care till ending.

3.Some people always throw stones in your path. It depends on you what
you make with them,Wall or Bridge? Remember you are the architect of
your life.

4.Every problem has (n+1) solutions, where n is the number of
solutions that you have triedAnd 1 is that you have not tried. That’s
life.

5.It’s not important to hold all the good cards in life. But it’s
important how well you playWith the cards which you hold.

6.Often when we lose all hope & think this is the end, God smiles from
above andSays, “relax dear it’s just a bend. Not the end.”Have Faith
and have a successful life.

7.When you feel sad, to cheer up just go to the mirror and say, “Damn
I am really so cute!” And you will overcome your sadness. But don’t
make this a habit coz liars go to hell.

8.One of the basic differences between God and human is, God gives,
gives and forgives.But ahuman gets, gets, gets and forgets. Be
thankful in life!

9.Only two types of persons are happy in this world. 1st is Mad and
2nd is Child.Be Mad to achieve what you desire and be a Child to enjoy
what You have achieved.



Buddha Stories, Zen Master Stories for personality Development

Give it time to settle down

Once Buddha was walking from one town to another town with a few of his followers. This was in the initial days. While they were traveling, they happened to pass a lake. They stopped there and Buddha told one of his disciples, “I am thirsty. Do get me some water from that lake there.”

The disciple walked up to the lake. When he reached it, he noticed that right at that moment, a bullock cart started crossing through the lake. As a result, the water became very muddy, very turbid. The disciple thought, “How can I give this muddy water to Buddha to drink!”

So he came back and told Buddha, “The water in there is very muddy. I don’t think it is fit to drink.” After about half an hour, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back to the lake and get him some water to drink. The disciple obediently went back to the lake.

This time too he found that the lake was muddy. He returned and informed Buddha about the same. After sometime, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back. The disciple reached the lake to find the lake absolutely clean and clear with pure water in it. The mud had settled down and the water above it looked fit to be had. So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to Buddha.

Buddha looked at the water, and then he looked up at the disciple and said,” See what you did to make the water clean. You let it be…. and the mud settled down on its own – and you got clear water. Your mind is also like that! When it is disturbed, just let it be. Give it a little time. It will settle down on its own. You don’t have to put in any effort to calm it down. It will happen. It is effortless.

I Left Her At The River

A senior and junior monk are walking down a path together and they come to a river with a strong current. As they prepare to cross they see a young, beautiful woman in need of help to brave the waters. She notices the monks and asks for help. The senior monk carries the woman on his shoulder and lets her gently down on the other bank. They part ways. The junior monk is upset.
Hours go by and the senior monk noticing the discomfort on the younger monk asks: Is something in your mind? The junior monk says: “As monks we are not permitted to touch a woman, how could you carry her across the river?” – The senior monk replies: “I left the woman hours ago at the bank, however, you seem to still be carrying her”.

Nobody In The Boat
The Taoists have a famous teaching about an empty boat that rams into your boat in the middle of a river. While you probably wouldn’t be angry at an empty boat, you might well become enraged if someone were at its helm.
The point of the story is that the parents who didn’t see you, the other kids who teased you as a child, the driver who aggressively tailgated you yesterday – are all in fact empty, rudderless boats. They were compulsively driven to act as they did by their own unexamined wounds, therefore they did not know what they were doing and had little control over it.

Just as an empty boat that rams into us isn’t targeting us, so too people who act unkindly are driven along by the unconscious force of their own wounding and pain.

Until we realize this, we will remain prisoners of our grievance, our past, and our victim identity, all of which keep us from opening to the more powerful currents of life and love that are always flowing through the present moment.

Is that So

There was a zen master who enjoyed a good reputation in his community. One day the neighbors came to his door enraged and furious, accusing him of having fathered the child that their teenager was about to bear.
The zen master said: “Is That So”? The rumors ran wild and the master lost his reputation. A few months later the child was born and the baby was brought to the zen master, who accepted and cared for him or her.
A year later the daughter of the neighbors admitted that the father was actually the butcher of the town. The parents, mortified, went back to the Zen master’s house and confessed, apologized and asked for the child back. The zen master said: Is that so? – then returned the baby.

Exactly Same Type of people here


There was a person coming to a new village, relocating, and he was wondering if he would like it there, so he went to the zen master and asked: do you think I will like it in this village? Are the people nice?
The master asked back: How were the people on the town where you come from? “They were nasty and greedy, they were angry and lived for cheating and stealing,” said the newcomer.
Those are exactly the type of people we have in this village, said the master.
Another newcomer to the village visited the master and asked the same question, to which the master asked: How were the people in the town where you come from? “They were sweet and lived in harmony, they cared for one another and for the land, they respected each other and they were seekers of spirit,” he replied.
Those are exactly the type of people we have in this village, said the master.

A farmer had only one horse. One day, his horse ran away. All the neighbors came by saying, “I'm so sorry. This is such bad news. You must be so upset.” The man just said, “We'll see.”

 A few days later, his horse came back with twenty wild horses. The man and his son corraled all 21 horses. All the neighbors came by saying, “Congratulations!

This is such good news. You must be so happy!” The man just said, “We'll see.”

 One of the wild horses kicked the man's only son, breaking both his legs. All the neighbors came by saying, “I'm so sorry. This is such bad news. You must be so upset.” The man just said, “We'll see.”

 The country went to war, and every able-bodied young man was drafted to fight. The war was terrible and killed every young man, but the farmer's son was spared, since his broken legs prevented him from being drafted.


 All the neighbors came by saying, “Congratulations! This is such good news. You must be so happy!” The man just said, “We'll see.”


 Not my problem

A zen master was going to his temple after his morning walk with his disciple. A man came, hit him hard on the back with a staff, and ran away. The master did not even look back; he continued his walk. The disciple could not believe it. He said, ’What is the matter with you? Are you mad? The man has hit so hard and he has escaped and you have not even looked back.’

The zen master said, ’That is his problem. How am I concerned with it? He must be mad, poor fellow. I feel much compassion for him. And I cannot look back, because he is already mad; my looking back may make him more mad. Already he will feel guilty back home; with my looking back he may feel that I have condemned him. No, that won’t be human. He is already in trouble. Now there is no need to create more trouble for him. That is his problem.’

When you are happy, then others’ problems are no more your problems. Let me say it in this way: when you have no problems, then nobody can throw his problem on you. Because you have problems, others can throw their problems on you and you become hooked.

Patience is a byproduct of inner bliss.

Dealing with insult
The Buddha explained how to handle insult and maintain compassion.

One day Buddha was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. "You have no right teaching others," he shouted. "You are as stupid as everyone else. You are nothing but a fake."

Buddha was not upset by these insults. Instead he asked the young man "Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?"

The man was surprised to be asked such a strange question and answered, "It would belong to me, because I bought the gift."

The Buddha smiled and said, "That is correct. And it is exactly the same with your anger. If you become angry with me and I do not get insulted, then the anger falls back on you. You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you have done is hurt yourself."

"If you want to stop hurting yourself, you must get rid of your anger and become loving instead. When you hate others, you yourself become unhappy. But when you love others, everyone is happy."

The young man listened closely to these wise words of the Buddha. "You are right, o Enlightened One, "he said. "Please teach me the path of love. I wish to become your follower."

The Buddha answered kindly, "Of course. I teach anyone who truly wants to learn. Come with me."


The Difference Between Pain and Suffering
There is a Buddhist teaching that says that when you get hurt, say, by an arrow, that is pain. The arrow hitting your arm, it hurts. Pain. However, there is a second arrow, which is your reaction to the arrow, the getting angry, the planning revenge, that is beyond pain, that is suffering.

EXISTANCE OF GOD: BY BUDDHA
Buddha entered a village. A man asked him as he was entering the village, "Does God exist?" He said, "No, absolutely no." 
In the afternoon another man came and he asked, "Does God exist?" And he said, "Yes, absolutely yes."
In the evening a third man came and he asked, "Does God exist?" Buddha closed his eyes and remained utterly silent. The man also closed his eyes. Something transpired in that silence. After a few minutes the man touched Buddha's feet, bowed down, paid his respects and said, "You are the first man who has answered my question."
Now, Buddha's attendant, Ananda, was very much puzzled: "In the morning he said no, in the afternoon he said yes, in the evening he did not answer at all. What is the matter? What is really the truth?"
So when Buddha was going to sleep, Ananda said, "First you answer me; otherwise I will not be able to sleep. You have to be a little more compassionate towards me too. I have been with you the whole day. Those three people don't know about the other answers, but I have heard all the three answers. What about me? I am troubled."
Buddha said, "I was not talking to you at all! You had not asked, I had not answered YOU. The first man who came was a theist, the second man who came was an atheist, the third man who came was an agnostic. My answer had nothing to do with God, my answer had something to do with the questioner. I was answering the questioner; it was absolutely unconcerned with God.
"The person who believes in God, I will say no to him because I want him to drop his idea of God, I want him to be free of his idea of God -- which is borrowed. He has not experienced. If he had experienced he would not have asked me; there would have been no need.
"The person who believed in God, he was trying to find confirmation for his belief from me. I was not going to say yes to him -- I am not going to confirm anybody's belief. I had to say no, I had to deny, just to destroy his belief, because all beliefs are barriers to knowing the truth.
"And the person with whom I remained silent was the right inquirer. He had no belief, hence there was no question of destroying anything. I kept silent. That was my message to him: Be silent and know. Don't ask, there is no need to ask. It is not a question which can be answered. It is not an inquiry but a quest, a thirst. Be silent and know.
I had answered him also; through my silence I gave him the message and he immediately followed it -- he also became silent. I closed my eyes, he closed his eyes; I looked in, he looked in, and then something transpired. That's why he was so much overwhelmed, he felt so much gratitude, for the simple reason that I did not give him any intellectual answer. He had not come for any intellectual answer; intellectual answers are available very cheap. He needed something existential -- he needed a taste. I gave him a taste."
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Life is Like a Book

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Keep Moving to keep the balance


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Trust gets you business rest all give you attention

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Responsibility is Taken, Not Given

Are you sitting at work waiting for someone to give you responsibility? Have you identified a process that needs fixing, a product that needs improving, a job not being done? Are you waiting for someone to promote you or to give you responsibility for something? If so, you’re going to wait for a long time.
Responsibility is taken, it isn’t given. Even if someone tries to give it to you, you don’t have responsibility until you take it. If you want something done, if you want a new role, if you want a promotion you just have to go out there and take it because no one is going to give it to you.
If you really want to get ahead, start doing your boss’s job.

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Breaks help drive faster

Once in a physics class, the teacher asked the students, "Why do we have brakes in a car?"

Varied answers were received:

"To stop"

"To reduce speed"

"To avoid collision" etc.,

But the best answer was,

"To enable you to drive faster"

Give it a thought.

For a moment assume you have no brakes in your car then how fast will you drive your car?

It's because of brakes that we can dare to accelerate, dare to go fast and reach destinations we desire.

At various points in life, we find our parents, teachers, mentors & friends etc. questioning our progress, direction or decision. We consider them as irritants or consider such inquiries as "brakes" to our ongoing work.

But, remember, it's because of such questions (periodical brakes) that you have managed to reach where you are today. Without brakes, you could have skid, lost direction or met with an unfortunate accident.
Appreciate the "brakes" in your life. Use them wisely!

Success Mantras and Stories

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Success Mantra : Tips for success


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Leadership and Management  Lessons
(including from Hollywood Movies, politicians and cricketers)
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LEADER IS DIFFERENT FROM MANAGER
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The Top Skills Every Manager Should Have

Influential
If you want people to go that extra mile then you have to be prepared to show them how it is done. The best managers and leaders are those who set an example by working the hardest and making the most effort. Managers who are complacent will either attract like-minded individuals or create a sense of resentment from their staff.
Communication
Good communication removes any doubt or misunderstanding from the workplace. That means making it absolutely clear to your staff what is expected from them. Steer clear of unnecessary jargon and double check that when you have briefed someone they have properly understood everything. However, the art of good communication is also about explaining the vision and values of a company. Every single employee should grasp exactly what the company stands for, and as a manager it is your responsibility.
Empathy
The soft skills of management should never be underestimated. If you want to get the very best from people you have to be able to understand exactly what it is that makes them tick. We are all complex and complicated individuals and are motivated in many different ways. Some are driven by financial incentives whereas others are focused on constantly developing their skill set. Some people need constant encouragement but others are more individualistic. The very best managers are the ones who are psychologically tuned in to all of their staff. Get that right and half the battle is already won.
Conviction
This is important at all times, but particularly in tough situations. Managing is not something that can be done half-heartedly and every decision should be taken with real purpose and decisiveness. Employees can very easily spot when somebody is not in control, so it is important you are never unsure of yourself. Whatever the situation; remain calm, gather all the necessary information, and make your decision with conviction.

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Checklist to become a great boss

Management fundas from Deeksha Singh, WCH Training Solutions :

If you can't stand your boss and dislike your job because of it, you are just a small part of a large community who feels the same. But what if you have recently moved into the role of a teamleader, boss or people manager yourself?

While the 'perfect boss' is a utopian concept, here is a quick checklist that will save you the heartburn of dealing with attrition and unhappy employees.

Always meet your people with a great smile
A smile can make a lot of difference. Always be cheerful and energetic and spread the attitude within your team or organisation. It drives great results. A smile and a warm handshake can wear off the stress that most employees go through, not to mention that it adds to your desirability factor at work. Also, smiling is contagious, and most people will find it easy to forgive you even if you happen to be a bit demanding on occasions.

Catch people doing things right
People make mistakes and sometimes they can repeat them, sometimes doing irreparable damage. But, have patience and let them grow. When they do things right, find them out and tell them it's a valuable contribution thay have made. Every interaction with your colleagues in the office is either a deposit or a withdrawal. As important as the Big Picture is, it will mean little if the boss shows little value for his team members' performance on a regular basis.

Appreciate generously

There is nothing more encouraging than appreciation for the smallest of difference one makes. For eg, when you enter the office after struggling hard with the traffic jam and the office looks clean or different, appreciate the person behind the effort and make him/ her "feel" how important the effort is to the organisation. Send your team emails, create a section where people can give compliments, etc. Positive feedback helps in building long-lasting habits. If you take certain positive behaviour for granted, you will be wasting time in reinforcing them later.

Be ready to say "I am sorry'"
If you erupt in a meeting, criticise a colleague's work or make ill-timed comments that you regret, how do you bounce back? Apologise immediately to the targeted person and to everyone around. Don't offer a long justification about the work pressure or a possible misunderstanding like most bosses do. Just say "I should not have reacted that way" and "I am sorry". This will show that you are professional and reflects positively on your character. It takes years to build up a reputation, and only seconds to destroy it. No matter what, don't snap or your people will think of you as a 'reactive boss'.

Help people prepare their goals and create a checklist
Be clear in communicating the desired goals from an individual in a team or the team as a whole. You should know your people, their strengths and opportunity areas. Team your people in a way where everyone learns and compliments each other's strengths.

A good manager not only coaches an employee to develop a skill but also helps in conditioning it as a behavior. In simple words, become a mentor, ie, a wise and trusted counselor/ teacher/ trainer, who can act as a catalyst for growth and nurture potential and talent. Building teams is not a one-time effort but an everyday process. Good managers involve, engage and inspire their teams on a daily basis.

Stay sharp

Read industry publications, reports and magazines and be aware of market trends. Your knowledge will reflect when you communicate with your team and they will look to you for advice and information. They will also talk positively about you with other members of the team. There is nothing better than third party publicity as it establishes you as a thought leader within your team.



Leader has to be pathfinder - Story of Akbar

The enemy army was almost at the gates. The city would surely fall. The only solution was to get Akbarto lead his soldiers. Mansingh ran into the palace to fetch the emperor and found Akbar in the garden listening to Tansen. Birbal stopped Mansingh from entering the garden. The emperor did not want to be disturbed. Tansen's song ended. 

Akbar asked him to sing another song. An impatient Mansingh said, "The city is on the verge of being destroyed and he is listening to music ! What's wrong with him." Birbal retorted, "He is not listening to music. He is figuring out battle strategies." Mansingh retorted, "What nonsense, all I can hear is the notes of Tansen's wonderful voice. No strategies there." Birbal laughed, "That is why you are merely a commander and Akbar is the emperor." 

Wisdom comes from the oddest of places. Ideas can come from anywhere. The difference between a pathfinder and a follower is the pathfinder's ability to see similarities between even the most distinct domains - music and battle strategies, for example. Followers are unable to understand the underlying principle and so need clear domain-specific examples. 

When Michael moved to Mumbai to take up a job at a pharmaceutical company, he realised that rules that worked back home in Germany would not work in India. When asked why, he said, "Oh, just look at how Indians eat!" Nobody understood. He explained, "In Germany, a proper meal is a course meal: soup, starter, main course and dessert. You eat what the chef cooks. But in India, a proper meal is a thali: all dishes are served simultaneously, the sweet and the sour and the pungent and the crispy. Everyone mixes and matches the food differently. 

So what one person puts in his mouth is very different from what another person puts in his mouth. This is the ultimate in customisation. A culture like this would not be comfortable with rules. People here would always like to bend the rules to their convenience, unlike Germany, where we enjoy following rules. I have to work harder here to get everyone to align and comply." Unlike most expats, Michael figured out a way to work with his Indian colleagues without being autocratic or authoritarian. He was wise enough to see common patterns between office behaviour and the way we eat food - a true hallmark of a pathfinder. 

During interviews, Narendra would ask the interviewees about Bollywood. As they spoke, he would see how they analysed the plots and the characters and the stars and by that he would be able to figure out how their mind functioned. Did they think originally? Did they follow the trend? Were the trend followers or trendsetters? Were they open to suggestion? Were they opinionated? Were they arrogant? The study of principles that are not impacted by the domain is known as tattva-gyan. 

[ The author is the Chief Belief Officer of the Future Group. He can be reached at devdutt@devdutt.com]



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Leadership

"The day the soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you stopped leading them. They have either lost confidence that you can help them or concluded that you do not care. Either case is a failure of leadership." - Colin Powell


Management is collaboration of Vision Strategy and execution
Sudhakar Ram who graduated from IIM-Calcutta in 1982 writes :

It is over 25 years since I graduated from B-school and many things may have changed since then. At the Indian Institute of Management, Calcutta, I learned how to use the tools, not how to be a craftsman.

However, like any other craft, management is best learnt at the feet of several master craftsmen. Over the years, I have distilled three basic abilities required to build a business or even lead any aspect of a business - the ability to envision, to strategise, and to execute.

The ability to envision: Vision is at the centre of any creation. Being able to envision the end state of a business or initiative is the key to making it happen. When groups of people are involved, explaining and enrolling people to a common vision help in converting groups into teams.
The ability to strategise: If vision comes from the heart, strategy is a product of the mind. It involves finding alternative routes to make things happen and selecting the optimal route. It is about making the best use of available resources and coming up with a game plan to deploy these resources to achieve victory.
The ability to execute: Execution is at the physical level. It is about ensuring that teams understand the plans, the processes and their roles, and have the necessary training and equipment to perform their roles effectively. It is also about ensuring progress is tracked, mid-course corrections are made and there is good communication flow across the entire chain.

While at a craft level, the master painter or the music virtuoso are able to bring all these abilities to bear in his creation, I have found that in mid-sized and large organisations, no individual has all these three qualities to the required degree. To ensure that the organisation grows over the long run, people with these different abilities must learn to collaborate and synergise.

For those aspiring to be super-managers, the journey is exciting and rewarding. The purpose of management is to lead and organise people to achieve results that they would not have been able to achieve as individuals, leading to prosperity for the whole team. What could be more fulfilling?

 from the front and he is a much better role model for young cricketers than those who went before him. In the past, the biggest problem with the Indian team was temperament. Which is why we would lose matches we were all set to win. Today, the team is temperamentally stronger, thanks to Dhoni. He is capable of leading Indian cricket itself, not just the team."

Dhoni certainly seems to enjoy being the captain, unlike Sachin Tendulkar, who was never happy taking charge. Bhogle believes Dhoni is a political animal at heart, which is why he's so inscrutable: "He wouldn't do anything to jeopordise his captaincy. He knows when to stay quiet and what to say in any given situation. He prefers to wait and watch rather than speak out."


Perspective on Empathic leadership 

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LEADERSHIP LESSONS
by Timothy F. Ryan,Vice Chairman - Markets, Strategy and Stakeholders Leader at PwC


I’ve had all of two employers during my career: Roche Bros, a local Boston supermarket chain where I worked in high school, and PwC. Most of the experiences I share tend to be about PwC—after all, I’ve been with the firm for over 25 years now. But the time I spent in the produce department at Roche Bros was formative: I learned lessons there that continue to influence my work ethic and my leadership style today.

One of the young boys in the produce department was a bit slower than the rest of us, but very thoughtful and considerate. One day, the other guys and I were goofing off and chatting up girls, while preparing lettuce for a display. Our manager, Richie Ordway, reprimanded us because the presentation wasn’t to his liking. We got a little defensive and asked, “What about the slower guy? Why isn’t he in trouble? Why don’t you ask him to do a better job?” Richie’s answer was swift and has stuck with me ever since, “Hey – knock it off! He’s giving 100 percent of what he can give. What more do you want?”
That incident was an early and lasting lesson for me. Richie had never gone to college, but he didn’t need a college education to be a great leader. He intuitively understood the importance of empathy, an appreciation of the specific talents and capabilities that each individual brings to the team, and he created an environment where people were respected, included and valued. He knew what each of us was capable of, and expected us to do our personal best.
I have faced some tough decisions over the course of my business career, and Richie’s example has provided great guidance. Ultimately, leadership is about how you treat people—your talent, your investors, and your clients. Leaders who treat others with respect command respect themselves. I feel very fortunate to have been taught that valuable lesson at the beginning of my career. It’s amazing what you can learn while stacking lettuce.

Learn their story

Not Just knowing everyone’s name in his building, but learn their stories. Instead of making a generic, “hi!”make every greeting specific: “Bob, how’s your mother doing?” or “Susan, congrats on the promotion!” And people will love you for it.

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                                                        LEADERSHIP QUALITIES


challenge the status quo

Scholars of electoral politics have associated leadership with charisma, oratory and the ability to motivate an organisation. In this rendition, Kejriwal and Modi are leaders who have made an impact. Both are charismatic. They are skilled public orators and can motivate their organisations. Rahul Gandhi too may have some of the same talents. However, in our view, Kejriwal and Modi have a large advantage because they are leading sentiments that challenge the status quo. In India, movements that challenge the political establishment have unique advantages. 
The contemporary political history of India has several examples of those who challenged the establishment - from Indira Gandhi challenging the 'syndicate' to Jayaprakash Narayan challenging Indira Gandhi's autocratic rule to NT Rama Rao, VP Singh and BSP founder Kanshi Ram and his colleague Mayawati challenging the leadership of Dalits in Congress.

Leadership is primarily about the credibility of a political message. This is where Kejriwal and Modi have a large advantage over Rahul Gandhi. Both Kejriwal and Modi have challenged the existing order. Kejriwal is challenging the collusion among mainstream parties engaged in high-end corruption, favouritism to certain private players and needless populism. He represents the frustration of common citizens who believe that they have no say in political system dominated by politicians with family  history and criminal background. His main message is that AAP and he offers a challenge to "politics as usual". 


Similarly, it would be naive to overlook Narendra Modi's high level of popularity. Modi's ascent within the party was marked by a challenge to the Delhi coterie of BJP. It is the first time in Indian political history that a state leader with no prior experience at national level has been officially anointed a PM candidate 
Modi too represents the challenge to the centrist consensus in Indian politics in multiple ways. He has constantly reminded voters that Congress had sidelined important leaders of the independence movement, like Patel, in its overzealous acclaim of members belonging to the Nehru-Gandhi dynasty. Second, his economic policy is considered synonymous with a market model. This stands in sharp contrast to Congress' far more centrist vision of Indian economy. Third, his speeches also suggest that he will continue to spearhead a campaign that advocates unapologetic majoritarian politics. 

Given this situation, an anointment of Rahul Gandhi as a PM candidate is unlikely to boost Congress' electoral fortunes in 2014. Rahul Gandhi is not a challenger. He is part of the establishment. Therefore, his ability to mobilise and move voters is far more limited than that of either Modi or Kejriwal. Spearheading a losing campaign would undermine his leadership credentials completely 


By: Pradeep Chhibber, Harsh Shah and Rahul Verma .The writers are with the Travers Dept of Political Science, University of California, Berkeley, US http://economictimes.indiatimes.com

Lessons salespeople can learn from politicians

While some salespeople may not be flattered, there’s no escaping that they’re a lot like politicians; both tend to over-promise and under-deliver. But there are some important lessons salespeople could learn from politicians.

With the coming provincial elections, congressional mid-terms and civic elections in Toronto in the fall, federal elections next year, and the never-ending Presidential campaign cranking up right after the next Super Bowl, there are plenty of opportunities for sellers to observe and learn.

The first thing salespeople can learn from politicians is the benefit of having a plan and sticking to it. salespeople are notorious for straying off course and not fully adhering to the company’s sales process. While their reasons may vary, it’s been been shown time and time again that the companies that continue to grow, even in the toughest market conditions, are the ones that have adhered to a clearly defined and dynamic sales process.
A clearly defined sales process should make it possible for even ‘complex sales’ to be mapped out and followed, and will include contingencies for common roadblocks, and ways to allow representatives to respond to unexpected scenarios. A dynamic sales process is less about being exciting or charismatic, like some politicians, and more about being able to adapt and evolve with market conditions and buyers’ expectations. Many organizations have a process, but it’s static; often introduced when a CRM was rolled out or when a new leader arrived. That’s a step up on companies without any process, or reps making it up as they go along. But if a process fails to reflect changes in the market, especially advances in buyer expectations and changes in the buying process, a static process can quickly become ineffective and often a barrier to revenue success.

When you think of good political campaigners, planning and then staying on plan, on task and on message, is a core capability. The good ones are able to do so while gauging public sentiment and incorporating changes into their talking points, plans and wins. The great ones are superb at striking a balance between the needs of their constituents – both the needs of their customers and the needs of their party – or company.

Another lesson for sellers is that politicians know they can’t do it alone. Given the state of buying and selling these days, a successful lone wolf is rare. Buyers have moved to buying by consensus, team buying, sellers should also use their teams to win. Those who leverage the resources available to them from their company, not just the process, CRM or other tools, but colleagues and specialists as well, succeed more often than those sellers who are selective and unsystematic in their use of resources. Buyers know that the sales rep is just that -- a rep -- and they want to leverage the full bench strength of the company. Politicians are adept at staying in the spotlight while benefiting from the work of their extended teams.
Of course, the biggest thing sellers can learn and practice is to stay on message, which starts with getting the message right from the start. Like it or not, polling is central to the message, and politicians love their polls. Politicians and their organizations continuously gauge the public’s opinion, directly and indirectly. One thing sales organizations and sales reps can do more of is talk to their customers, asking specific questions that not only help them understand what the objectives of the clients are, but why and how they plan to achieve them, and what is standing in their way of succeeding. But most importantly challenging the buyers by opening their eyes to alternate possibilities to succeeding.

Politicians understand that if they’re going to win, they need constant feedback. The ones that don’t take input or miss the public’s signals are the ones that come up short on Election Day. The same is true for sales. Failing to challenge buyers and incorporate feedback, and simply pitching solutions, will leave them short when the prospect votes with their wallet.


TIBOR SHANTO
Special to The Globe and Mail
Published Tuesday, Mar. 11 2014, 5:00 AM EDT

Tibor Shanto is a principal at Renbor Sales Solutions Inc. He can be reached at tibor.shanto@sellbetter.ca. His column appears once a month on theReport on Small Business

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Leadership Styles from Cricket
MS Dhoni's leadership style and the lessons it holds for corporate CEOs

How does Mahinder Singh Dhoni maintain an aura of calm even when the Indian cricket team is getting a drubbing? Why doesn't the captain exhibit signs of anguish in the face of defeat, like Rahul Dravid and Saurav Ganguly quite often did before him? Doesn't he care? "Winning is important to Dhoni," says for player and cricketer commentator Sanjay Manjrekar, "but losing is not that important. It's a very rare leadership quality."

A calm mind is the most dangerous and Dhoni's ability to stay cool when the heat is on allows him to make the uncanny calls that others find hard to fanthom. "For champions, the big day is like every day," says cricket commentator and author Harsha Bhogle. "The great captains of the world know that if you fear losing, you will be agitated, which invites losing. We can never know what's going on inside Dhoni's head. If he is stressed, he never lets it show."

Dissecting Dhoni's leadership style for a corporate audience at the ESPNCricinfo 20th anniversary event in Mumbai earlier this month, the two commentators, along with Prakash Iyer, managing director of Kimberley Clark, agreed that this sense of detachment in times of crisis is the hallmark of the captain's leadership style. Manjrekar says that one of the reasons Dhoni remain unruffled is because he insulates himself from extraneous influences. "Dhoni is either unaware of what commentators say about him or he doesn't care. He didn't seem affected by the conflict of interest scandal, when he was in the headlines. In that way he's different from a captain like Ganguly, who was always attuned to what the press was saying about him."

Dhoni's ability to insulate himself and his team from extraneous influences in order to focus on the game is one of his biggest strengths. He is also known to back his players, giving them time to gain full potential. "The players know that Dhoni will not hastily judge them," says Manrekar. "They just need to have the right attitude and show courage in the field. He empowers them. He's not a controlling kind of captain."

Dhoni may empower, but when it comes to key strategic decisions, he is his own man, seldom seeking advice. Manjrekar compares him to Azharuddin, who would always huddle with senior players during the drink break and ask their advice on what to do next: "Dhoni doesn't do that. He doesn't need advice. And after losing a match, he doesn't need comforting."

In cricket and in the corporate world, there is always a tendency to promote the best player to captaincy. This often creates tension between personal performance and team performance. In the corporate world, people do look askance at leaders who fail to perform. "A corporate leader needs to personally effective. People in office would point at a CEO who fails to swing an important deal," says Iyer.
In cricket, however, a captain's personal performance and team performance need to be separated. "If you're not doing well yourself, you still have to get performance from others. These are two different things. I remember Gavaskar in 1985-86. He was willing to sit back and let everyone else get ahead," says Bhogle.

Is Dhoni the best captain Indian cricket ever had? And is he going to leave the game better than it was? While the rest of the panel is ambivalent, Manjrekar is unequivocal: "I'm a fan. Dhoni leads


Top 10 Movies for Management Students

After the books it’s the time for movies which provide us some meaningful insights. Right from being a leader to running a business, ethics and profits, Purpose of Company and the importance of People for any business. All these movies teach us something or the other. Please enjoy reading as KP takes you along with these movies.
1)        The Secret of My Success | 1987
Starring : Michael J. Fox, Helen Slater, Richard Jordan
         
A great comedy about a young Midwesterner (Michael J. Fox) traveling to the big city to begin his corporate career. The Movie is a must watch for Young Graduates at the brink of Starting their corporate career. Although the plot seems stretchy at times but it is spot on teaching us how to handle the Work Pressure. Brantley Foster is into Two jobs simultaneously. Watch his two lives push you to the edge of your seats.
 2)     Something Ventured | 2011
         Starring: Bill Bowes, Herbert Boyer

It's about the history of the VC industry and Silicon Valley.
It did a fine job of communicating what the founding actors of VC are really like. One gets the feeling that if this hadn't been captured like this today, it might never have been captured in this first-person way
3)   Inside Job | 2010
     Starring: Matt Damon, William Ackman, Daniel Alpert

 A post-mortem of the most significant global economic crisis in decades, pointing to shared culpability across many institutions, government and organizations. The Movie is systematically divided into 5 Parts, starting right from how we started to get into the Trap of Financial Crisis to the Culpability of the same. Also won the Academy award for the Best Documentary. The film is described by Ferguson as being about "the systemic corruption of the United States by the financial services industry and the consequences of that systemic corruption."
 4)  The Social Network | 2010
    Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Andrew Garfield, Justin Timberlake
A must-see primer on how the millennials think, invent, and connect—and how bumpy the ride can be from rags to riches. The movie portrays the changing dynamics of Business World in today’s Scenario. It tremendously portrays about how small small decisions make to a Big Empire.
Though the Plot is a bit far from factual, but is embedded with Management Lessons.
5)  The Godfather | 1970
     Starring: Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan
An all tym Great and Classics. This is awesome movie when we give regard to Leardership styles. The Gang Wars shown are very similar to the Corporate Wars which take place now a days except that they are less about bullets. Don Corleone plays the role which has Charisma and Foresight to look into the tym after him.
Michael Corleone, in ordering execution for a top lieutenant's switching loyalty says, "Tessio was smarter," indicating that it did not surprise him that Tessio would be the first to switch allegiance to a new leader when the old leader was past his prime
6)  Wall Street | 1987
     Starring: Charlie Sheen, Michael Douglas, and Tamara Tunie
The story is about a character (Charlie Sheen) who is torn between the moral and ethical upbringing he received from his father (Martin Sheen) and the allure of wealth and power as embodied by Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas). The Movie shows to the people how insider trading takes place in corporations. But the Movie is not just about financial knowledge but more about how one needs to make his decision.
Its nice to make money but not at the cost of common good to the People
7) Up in the Air | 2009
    Starring: George Clooney, Vera Farmiga, & Anna Kendrick

As the Golden Saying Depicts that Business is all about people. It tells the leaders the Responsibility of Organisations towards the employee.  Reminds all leaders that organizations—no matter how complex or technologically advanced—are about people, not "things". The Best Capital available to the Company are its people.
Remember, “ Business is all about people”
8) Tunes of Glory | 1960
    Starring: Alec Guinness, John Mills
How does a leader "take charge?" This movie raises a host of lessons about leading. It also offers rich insights about the psychology of managerial bullies. Dramatic kudos to Alec Guinness, who plays the bully. A must watch for all the managers and the persons who are striving to become managers. The Plot is set up in an Army Compund where John Sinclair (Alec Guiness) announces his last day as commanding officer. What happens next… Watch and Find Out !!!!
9)   Risky Business | 1983
      Starring: Tom Cruise, Rebecca De Mornay, Joe Pantoliano

Though the Plot is a little dramatic but so tremendously it displays the certain management tips about how not to be swayed by circumstances. It gives a lesson that relentless efforts are ultimately paid off.  The most important lesson is the way Joel Goodson achieves his ultimate objective in the midst of all the Drama.
10)  A Christmas Carol | 1984
Starring: George C. Scott, Frank Finlay
The film addresses the most fundamental question of what business is about. Is it simply profits or some broader purpose? As Marley answers the question: "Mankind was my business! Their common welfare was my business!" This movie throws light on the Famous Stakeholders Theory about how important it is to actually for the Business to take care the of all the stakeholders. Also when it comes to setting the Vision and Mission of the Organisation then this movie can be path breaking for decion Companies.
boilerroomaDrama/Thriller (2000)
Actors: Giovanni Ribisi, Vin Diesel, Nia Long, Ben Affleck
Recommended by: Philip Hatlem
Plot: Desperate to please his father who is federal judge, Seth Davis, an ambitious, intelligent college dropout gets a job as a stockbroker for a small firm. Lured by big commissions and dreams of wealth, he becomes very successful at sales, but comes to question the legitimacy of his firm’s operations.
Worth the watch: “Boiler Room” is a movie about ethics in business during the dot-com bubble of the late 1990s and the ‘get-rich-quick’ mentality that defined that period. It also teaches a lesson about the importance of thoroughly investigating a potential job before accepting it.

Citizen-KaneDrama/Mystery (1941)
Actors: 
Orson Welles, Dorothy Comingore, Joseph Cotton
Recommended by: Dr. Patti Williams
Plot: Charles Foster Kane is a newspaper tycoon who starts out with good intentions but gets obsessed with the pursuit of power. This movie takes the audience through a sequence of flashbacks as a reporter attempts to untangle the mystery of the mogul's dying words, “Rosebud.”
Worth the watch: Kane starts his career as an idealistic newspaper man and accumulates much wealth but loses his soul in the process, dying old and alone. This movie emphasizes the impact of greed and the fact that money does not bring happiness

Draft-DayDrama (2014)
Actors:
 Kevin Costner, Chadwick Boseman, Jennifer Garner
Recommended by: Dr. Kathryn Adamson
Plot: As the general manager for the Cleveland Browns, Sonny Weaver has the opportunity to rebuild his team on draft day when he trades for the number one pick. Professional complications and pressures abound as the day unfolds and Weaver must weigh his personal convictions and decide what sacrifices he’s willing to make.
Worth the watch: “Draft Day” illustrates the complicated process of decision-making, especially when under pressure. Business decisions are influenced by multiple factors including time, money, other individuals, and personal motives. This movie demonstrates the importance of keeping the main thing, the main thing, and the power of negotiation.

Glengarry-Glen-RossDrama: (1992)
Actors: Al Pacino, Jack Lemmon, Alec Baldwin
Recommended by: Philip Hatlem
Plot: Adapted from the Pulitzer Prize winning play by David Mamet, the film focuses on four desperate real estate agents who sell investment properties in retirement developments. Under corporate pressure to increase performance, they are forced to compete in a sales contest. Since the losers will be fired, the agents resort to treachery to fool potential clients.
Worth the watch: While potentially lucrative, sales is usually viewed as a competitive and somewhat risky career path; therefore, many companies today are having a difficult time filling sales positions. This film depicts sales tactics to follow such as acting with confidence, speaking with passion, paying attention to details and connecting with clients as well as numerous obvious tactics to avoid, including lying, cheating and stealing.

Money-BallDrama (2011)
Actors: Brad Pitt, Robin Wright, Jonah Hill
Recommended by: Dr. Ronda Mariani
Plot: Oakland A’s General Manager Billy Beane has his back against the wall to assemble a winning baseball team with the lowest salary constraint in baseball. He hires a young Ivy League grad to scientifically analyze data based on Bill James’ statistic approach so that Beane can select undervalued players based on their on base percentages.
Worth the watch: For management students, this film demonstrates the value of innovative thinking and the importance of implementing new processes to drive change and create solutions. It’s also a great example of having the courage to take calculated risks.

Office-SpaceComedy (1999)
Actors: Ron Livingston, Jennifer Anniston, David Herman
Recommended by: Dr. Patti Williams
Plot: Continually humiliated by their soulless boss, computer programmer Peter Gibbons and his two friends hate their jobs at Initech. When the company hires efficiency exerts as the first step toward corporate downsizing, they devise a plan to extract revenge.
Worth the watch: The young professionals in this movie took the right path by going to college, choosing a stable career and working hard; yet they found themselves confined to cubicles with managers who lacked the skills to inspire or stimulate them. This film stresses the importance of being an effective manager. Getting to know subordinates, their roles and abilities, and conversing with them about their desires creates a more satisfying and more dynamic workplace.

OutsourcedDrama (2007)
Actors: Josh Hamilton, Ayesha Dharker
Recommended by: Dr. Ronda Mariani
Plot: Call center manager for a novelty company in Seattle, Todd Anderson travels to India to train his replacement when the company outsources center operations to Bombay. Cultural differences and misunderstandings abound as Anderson tries to teach the new staff about American culture and what American customers expect, while learning more about Indian culture so that that he can help the workers be successful.
Worth the watch:
 Dr. Mariani recommends this film particularly for international management students since it provides insight into the influence of cultural differences when conducting business in a global marketplace and a glimpse into the impact of a global economy.

The-CorporationHistory/Documentary (2004)
Directors: Mark Achbar, Jennifer Abbott
Recommended by: Dr. Chris McChesney
Plot: Winner of numerous international awards, this film is based on the book The Corporation: The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power by Joel Bakan. It includes interviews with 40 corporate executives from a range of industries, business insiders and critics.
Worth the watch: This film teaches students about the various aspects and intricacies of corporations in America and how the corporation has evolved in the business world of today. It covers important topics for business students including: branding, capitalism, corporate crime, marketing, social responsibility, regulation, strategies for change and more.

The-Social-NetworkDrama (2010)
Actors:
 Jesse Eisenberg, Rooney Mara, Justin Timberlake
Recommended by: Dr. Sherrie Lewis
Plot: A movie about Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, the youngest billionaire in history and the legal and personal complications that result from creating the social networking site known as Facebook. It begins with website’s inception in a Harvard University dorm room and continues through the battles over ownership among its originators.
Why it’s worth the watch: Dr. Lewis says this is another good film about business ethics, emotional intelligence, power and leadership.



The-Wolf-Of-Wall-StreetBiography/Dark Comedy/Crime (2013)
Actors: Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill, Margot Robbie
Recommended by: Dr. Sherrie Lewis
Plot: Involving crime, corruption and the federal government, this movie documents the rise and fall of Wall Street stockbroker Jordan Belfort who served 22 months in prison for defrauding investors in a massive securities scam. It’s the story of corporate greed and excessive affluence in the late eighties.
Why it’s worth the watch: This movie could be used to discuss business ethics, emotional intelligence, power and leadership. According to Dr. Lewis, her students enjoy discussing Belfort's charisma and how he used it to defraud others

Wall-StreetDrama/Crime (1987 and 2010)
Actors: 
Michael Douglas, Charlie Sheen, Daryl Hannah, Shia LaBeouf
Recommended by: Dr. Patti Williams
Plot: Ruthless, greedy corporate raider Gordon Gekko mentors a young, ambitious and impatient stockbroker who ends up trading on illegal insider information. Gekko spends time in prison for money laundering, but in the sequel comes back to extract revenge on his Wall Street enemies and rebuild his empire.
Worth the watch: This movie reflects the extent people will go to make money and the consequences of these actions.  It offers a look at what influence and greed can do to the human soul.

Walmart-The-High-Cost-Of-Low-PricesDocumentary (2005)
Actors: 
Lee Scott, Don Hunter, Jon Hunter
Recommended by: Dr. Chris McChesney
Plot: Interviews with former employees, small business owners impacted by Walmart’s presence in their communities and archival footage of Walmart executives combined with statistics create a critical documentary and negative picture of Walmart’s business practices.
Worth the watch: This movie gives students an idea about how Walmart works as a corporation, how they treat their employees, their feelings toward union negotiations, and the overall strategy of the company. Dr. McChesney says that while this movie is a little dated, it still provides valuable information for business students.

Personality, Charishma, Likability impact your acceptance level as a leader or as a speaker 

"Likability" is becoming a bigger factor for success at work as social networks and videoconferencing grow. The impact goes beyond a high-school popularity contest. The ability to come across as likable is shaping how people are sized up and treated by bosses and co-workers.
Likable people are more apt to be hired, get help at work, get useful information from others and have mistakes forgiven. A study of 133 managers last year by researchers at the University of Massachusetts found that if an auditor is likable and gives a well-organized argument, managers tend to comply with his suggestions, even if they disagree and the auditor lacks supporting evidence.

Likability is more important—and harder to pull off—on video than in person. Sometimes this can result in a style-over-substance effect. People watching a speaker on a videoconference are more influenced by how much they like the speaker than by the quality of the speaker's arguments, according to a 2008 study in Management Science. The opposite is true when a speaker appears in person. The use of personal videoconferencing is expected to grow 47% annually through 2017, according to Wainhouse Research, a Boston market-research firm.

Social networking also places a premium on likability. More employers track employees' likability on in-house social networks and chat services. They recruit those who are trusted and well-liked to spread information or push through changes. Some companies take these employees' social clout into account when handing out raises and promotions.
Listeners tend to like speakers who seem trustworthy and authentic, who tell an engaging or persuasive story and who seem to have things in common with them, says Noah Zandan, president of Quantified Impressions in Austin, Texas, a provider of communications analytics. On video, these qualities can be hard to convey.

Many people make a negative impression on video by becoming stiff and emotionless, or by exaggerating their points. "Overacting is rampant. It's easy to go Ryan Seacrest when the red light goes on," says Tim Sanders, author of "The Likeability Factor" and a lecturer on the topic.
Job applicants interviewed on video receive lower likability ratings and interview scores, and are less likely to be recommended for hiring, than candidates interviewed in person, according to a study published last year in Management Decision.

But coaches say that likability can be taught. "Likability isn't something you are born with, like charisma. It's something you can learn," says Ben Decker, chief executive officer of Decker Communications, San Francisco, a training and consulting firm.
The "big three" behaviors most important to a speaker's likability are making eye contact by looking into the camera, smiling naturally when you talk and varying your tone of voice to convey warmth and enthusiasm, Mr. Decker says. To show the importance of nonverbal cues, he has clients role-play on video the first few minutes of an imaginary conversation with a client—then watch themselves with the sound off.

Mr. Decker also urges clients to "really think about the listener" and figure out goals he or she might share with you. The ability to find common ground with others is a cornerstone of likability.

Melissa Temple-Agosta has her salespeople take Decker training partly so they learn to come across as warm and engaging in training videos. Many were likable in person, but "when you put them in front of a camera, they froze," says Ms. Temple-Agosta, assistant vice president, education and training, for Urban Decay Cosmetics, Newport Beach, Calif., a division of L'Oréal. Employees learn to think less about their appearance and more about how to forge a connection with listeners.
Senior executives at Charles Schwab & Co. take the training partly because "making sure you come across as authentic and as someone who can be trusted becomes more important" when speaking to large groups on video or webcasts, says Jay L. Allen, executive vice president, human resources, for the San Francisco-based financial services firm. Managers also learn to speak with more enthusiasm on video, varying their tone, Mr. Allen says.

It is important to get to the point quickly on video, because viewers' attention span is short, Mr. Sanders says. Research shows that watching people on video imposes mental demands, called "cognitive load" by scientists, that make it harder to avoid distractions and process what is said.
Mr. Sanders suggests paying special attention to others' facial expressions in videoconferences, stopping the conversation to acknowledge their feelings if necessary. Empathizing with others' feelings creates a sense of connection.

A common mistake people make on video is to play the comedian. Mr. Sanders says: "If you insist on poking fun at someone, it has to be you."

Likability Tips

Authenticity | To be more likable, behave in a way that feels natural and comfortable, rather than stiff or self-absorbed. Kyle T.Webster
Curiosity | Show interest in others, make eye contact and ask questions about others' opinions and activities. Kyle T.Webster
Expressiveness | Vary tones of voice and smile, and show enthusiasm about what you're saying—even more so in a videoconference. Kyle T.Webster
Listening | Focus on what others are saying and show that you are listening carefully, rather than getting distracted. Kyle T.Webster
Mimicry | Mirror the expressions or posture of the person you are talking to, in order to create a sense of familiarity. Kyle T.Webster
Similarity | Actively try to find topics of interest you share with a listener, rather than talking only about what interests you. Kyle T.Webster
Sue Shellenbarger at sue.shellenbarger@wsj.com

Business Adventures or John Brooks


The Best Business Book I have Ever Read

 by Bill Gates for The Wall Street Journal.
 Not long after I first met Warren Buffett back in 1991, I asked him to recommend his favorite book about business. He didn’t miss a beat: “It’s Business Adventures, by John Brooks,” he said. “I’ll send you my copy.” I was intrigued: I had never heard ofBusiness Adventures or John Brooks.
Today, more than two decades after Warren lent it to me—and more than four decades after it was first published—Business Adventures remains the best business book I’ve ever read. John Brooks is still my favorite business writer. (And Warren, if you’re reading this, I still have your copy.)
A skeptic might wonder how this out-of-print collection of New Yorker articles from the 1960s could have anything to say about business today. After all, in 1966, when Brooks profiled Xerox, the company’s top-of-the-line copier weighed 650 pounds, cost $27,500, required a full-time operator, and came with a fire extinguisher because of its tendency to overheat. A lot has changed since then.
It’s certainly true that many of the particulars of business have changed. But the fundamentals have not. Brooks’s deeper insights about business are just as relevant today as they were back then. In terms of its longevity, Business Adventures stands alongside Benjamin Graham’s The Intelligent Investor, the 1949 book that Warren says is the best book on investing that he has ever read.
Brooks grew up in New Jersey during the Depression, attended Princeton University (where he roomed with future Secretary of State George Shultz), and, after serving in World War II, turned to journalism with dreams of becoming a novelist. In addition to his magazine work, he published a handful of books, only some of which are still in print. He died in 1993.
As the journalist Michael Lewis wrote in his foreword to Brooks’s book The Go-Go Years, even when Brooks got things wrong, “at least he got them wrong in an interesting way.” Unlike a lot of today’s business writers, Brooks didn’t boil his work down into pat how-to lessons or simplistic explanations for success. (How many times have you read that some company is taking off because they give their employees free lunch?) You won’t find any listicles in his work. Brooks wrote long articles that frame an issue, explore it in depth, introduce a few compelling characters, and show how things went for them.
In one called “The Impacted Philosophers,” he uses a case of price-fixing at General Electric to explore miscommunication—sometimes intentional miscommunication—up and down the corporate ladder. It was, he writes, “a breakdown in intramural communication so drastic as to make the building of the Tower of Babel seem a triumph of organizational rapport.”
In “The Fate of the Edsel,” he refutes the popular explanations for why Ford’s flagship car was such a historic flop. It wasn’t because the car was overly poll-tested; it was because Ford’s executives only pretended to be acting on what the polls said. “Although the Edsel was supposed to be advertised, and otherwise promoted, strictly on the basis of preferences expressed in polls, some old-fashioned snake-oil selling methods, intuitive rather than scientific, crept in.” It certainly didn’t help that the first Edsels “were delivered with oil leaks, sticking hoods, trunks that wouldn’t open, and push buttons that…couldn’t be budged with a hammer.”
One of Brooks’s most instructive stories is “Xerox Xerox Xerox Xerox.” (The headline alone belongs in the Journalism Hall of Fame.) The example of Xerox is one that everyone in the tech industry should study. Starting in the early ’70s, the company funded a huge amount of R&D that wasn’t directly related to copiers, including research that led to Ethernet networks and the first graphical user interface (the look you know today as Windows or OS X).
But because Xerox executives didn’t think these ideas fit their core business, they chose not to turn them into marketable products. Others stepped in and went to market with products based on the research that Xerox had done. Both Apple and Microsoft, for example, drew on Xerox’s work on graphical user interfaces.
I know I’m not alone in seeing this decision as a mistake on Xerox’s part. I was certainly determined to avoid it at Microsoft. I pushed hard to make sure that we kept thinking big about the opportunities created by our research in areas like computer vision and speech recognition. Many other journalists have written about Xerox, but Brooks’s article tells an important part of the company’s early story. He shows how it was built on original, outside-the-box thinking, which makes it all the more surprising that as Xerox matured, it would miss out on unconventional ideas developed by its own researchers.
Brooks was also a masterful storyteller. He could craft a page-turner like “The Last Great Corner,” about the man who founded the Piggly Wiggly grocery chain and his attempt to foil investors intent on shorting his company’s stock. I couldn’t wait to see how things turned out for him. (Here’s a spoiler: Not well.) Other times you can almost hear Brooks chuckling as he tells some absurd story. There’s a passage in “The Fate of the Edsel” in which a PR man for Ford organizes a fashion show for the wives of newspaper reporters. The host of the fashion show turns out to be a female impersonator, which might seem edgy today but would have been scandalous for a major American corporation in 1957. Brooks notes that the reporters’ wives “were able to give their husbands an extra paragraph or two for their stories.”
Brooks’s work is a great reminder that the rules for running a strong business and creating value haven’t changed. For one thing, there’s an essential human factor in every business endeavor. It doesn’t matter if you have a perfect product, production plan, and marketing pitch; you’ll still need the right people to lead and implement those plans.
That is a lesson you learn quickly in business, and I’ve been reminded of it at every step of my career, first at Microsoft and now at the foundation. Which people are you going to back? Do their roles fit their abilities? Do they have both the IQ and EQ to succeed? Warren is famous for this approach at Berkshire Hathaway, where he buys great businesses run by wonderful managers and then gets out of the way.



Business Adventures is as much about the strengths and weaknesses of leaders in challenging circumstances as it is about the particulars of one business or another. In that sense, it is still relevant not despite its age but because of it. John Brooks’s work is really about human nature, which is why it has stood the test of time.

The One Minute Manager Meets The Monkey
by Kenneth Blanchard, William Oncken, Jr., and Hal Burrows

If i let you park your problem with me, i will endup doing injustice to both you and me

If you are someone who feels overwhelmed with the problems created by other people, reading this book and applying the lessons learned from it can change your life. It definitely did to mine. It preaches to the discerning reader an unforgettable lesson;how to save time to do what you want & need to do. Step by step the authors of this book using examples & story-telling show how the managers can free themselves from doing everyone else’s job and ensure that every problem is handled by the proper person. By using the 4 – rules of Monkey Management, managers of today will learn to become effective supervisors of time, energy and their own talent.
The book begins by telling a story about a harried monkey manager who worked for long, hard hours, yet never quite seemed to get caught up with all the work he had to do. He then learned about monkey management and how not to take initiative away from his people so they can care for and feed their own “monkeys.” In this process, he learned to be more effective in dealing with his own manager and the demands of his organization. The performance of his department drastically improved as did the prospects for his career.
In the good old days, when one became a manager things were a lot easier because one’s own performance depended strictly on one’s own efforts. In those days, the longer and harder one worked, the more work one got done. However, in today’s age, the formula works in reverse. Typically all that the managers these days do are to shuffle between papers without ever making progress on the real work that needs to be done. This is defined as triumph of technique over purpose; one is doing more but accomplishing less. How Paradox this is! There is just no time left to implement the ideas for improving operations, to do planning, coordinating, staffing, and other key managerial tasks that will keep the unit functioning well towards the future. And then attempts to address these key issues by working overtime, on weekends, attending seminars, hiring outside help address merely the symptoms of the problem, not the cause itself. It is like taking an aspirin to reduce the fever but ignoring the illness that caused the fever. As a result, the problem gets progressively worse.
In this book, A Monkey is defined as “the next move.” Typically a manager’s subordinate will have a problem. Whilst he is explaining it to him, the monkey is on his back. When they both are talking, the matter is under joint consideration i.e. the monkey had one leg on each of their backs. When the manager says that he needs time to think over a possible solution to the problem the monkey has moved his leg from the subordinate’s back onto the manager’s back and the subordinate walks away 10 kilos lighter. In this manner the manager assumes the worker role & vice-versa. For every monkey there are two parties involved: one to work for it and one to supervise it.
When the manager picks up the monkeys that his people could have handled, he gives the message that he wants the monkeys. So naturally, the more he picks up, the more he gets. And so on a normal workday, he has as many as he can handle apart from the regular requirements of the job like reporting to his Boss and others. This way the monkeys keep coming & multiplying to a point where he has to borrow time from his personal life: exercise, hobbies, and eventually the family. And then the manager starts to procrastinate whilst the staff waits. This is referred as a costly duplication of effort. By spending all his time working on other people’s monkeys means that the manager has no opportunity to work on his own. He is not managing. He is being managed. He is not proactive, but strictly reactive. He is merely coping.
The manager is recommended to attend to a seminar titled “Managing Management Time” which helps him to learn the golden principle “Things not worth doing are not worth doing well.” & “The more you get rid of your people’s monkeys, the more time you have for your people”.As a manager, to the extent that one can get people to care for and feed their own monkeys, they are really managing the work themselves.
This is illustrated in the book by the Oncken’s 4 Rules of Monkey Management. The dialogue between a boss and one of his or her people must not end until all monkeys have:
Rule 1. Appropriate “next moves” identified and specified.
Rule 2. Owners: The monkey is assigned to a person i.e. who is responsible for it, ownership. This must begin from the lowest organizational level consistent with their welfare.
Rule 3. Insurance Policies: The risk is covered. Every Monkey leaving the presence of the Manager on the back of one of his people must be “recommended & acted upon” or “acted & then advised upon.”
Rule 4. Monkey feeding and checkup appointments: The time and place for follow-up is specified. Proper follow-up means healthier monkeys. Every monkey should have a checkup appointment.
The author states an example of these 4 rules by way of a dialogue between a manager and a subordinate. The manager explains to his subordinate, “We do not have a problem, and we will never again have one. I am sure that there is a problem, but it is not ours, it is either yours or mine. The first item on the agenda is to neaten up the pronouns and find out whose problem this is. If it turns out to be my problem, I hope you will help me with it. If it turns out to be your problem, I will help you with it subject to the following condition: at no time while I am helping you with your problem will your problem become my problem, because the minute your problem becomes my problem, you will no longer have a problem and I can’t help a person who does not have a problem!”
The purpose of the rules of monkey management is to help ensure that the right things get done theright way at the right time by the right people. On a precautionary note, the author also states the rules of Monkey Management should be applied only to monkeys that deserve to live. Some do not. He urges to ask the question: “why are we doing this?” If there is no viable answer, shoot the monkey so that the next time one will not be doing more efficiently things that should not have been done in the first place. The monkey is not a project or a problem; the monkey is whatever the ‘next move’ is on a project or a problem.
In order to ensure that the problem does not occur repeatedly i.e. a permanent cure the author recommends:
· Delegation – whereby the people are achieving more and more with less and less involvement fromthe manager. Whilst assigning involves a single monkey; delegation involves a family of monkeys. And once delegation is reached, staying there is easy compared with the job of getting there.
· Practice Hands-Off Management as much as possible and Hands-On Management as much as necessary. People are fully responsible for their projects unless a problem is encountered that requires intervention. This practice leads to self-managementwhich is a lot better than the high degree of boss-management that one experience’s while assigning monkeys. The assignments should be boss-initiated only to the extent that the staff member cannot initiate them.
· It is better to strike a straight blow with a crooked stick rather than spend the whole life trying to straighten the darn thing out.
What are the learning’s that one derives at the end of reading this book? That one must be able to clearly measure success by what one is able to get the people to do, not by what one does by oneself. In order to do that, the mentality has to change from that of a do-er to that of a manager.Learn to replace the psychological rewards of doing with the rewards of managing, namely, deriving satisfaction from what the people do and being recognized, paid, and promoted accordingly.
In the past, one spent much of the time fighting fires; now most of them can be prevented by spending just a little time in advance. In the past, a great deal of one’s time is spent in reacting to other people; now it can be spent a great deal in proactive measures. These include doing some advance planning for a change so as to enable to do the right things the right way the first time instead of having to do them over so often.
Perhaps the greatest lesson learnt about monkey management, at work and at home, is that there are always more monkeys clamoring for attention than the time one has to manage them. Hence unless one is extremely careful about which to accept responsibility for, it is very easy to wind up caring for the wrong monkeys while the really important ones are starving for lack of attention. If we thoughtlessly try to handle all of them, our efforts will be diluted to the point where none of them are healthy.





Is Your Boss Too Nice
If your Boss is a Nice man, your career may be at risk

Yes, it can be pleasant to work for someone who is kind and thoughtful but there’s a difference between bosses who are pleasant to work for and those who avoid conflict at all costs. Managers in the latter category don’t give tough feedback, shy away from going to bat for their teams, and give in too easily to demands. If this sounds like your boss, your career may be at risk.

What the Experts Say“I’m 100% in favor of kindness and compassion in leadership. What I don’t believe in is a boss who in the name of niceness, doesn’t do what he’s supposed to,” says Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. Working for a manager who is conflict-averse can have deleterious effects on your performance and your career. Linda Hill, the Wallace Brett Donham Professor of Business Administration at Harvard Business School and coauthor of Being the Boss: The 3 Imperatives for Becoming a Great Leader, says that many of these bosses aren’t aware of the effect they’re having on their direct reports. “My experience with leaders like this is that they don’t know they’re behaving that way,” she says. Here’s how to mitigate the potential damage of a boss who is too nice.

Be empatheticHaving a boss who doesn’t stand up for you is frustrating —  but don’t blame him. “New bosses are particularly prone to this. Have a little sympathy that he’s trying to gain credibility with his peers and boss,” says Hill. If you see the situation from his perspective (rather than painting him as the enemy), you’ll be better able to help him.

Directly address the issueStart by talking to your boss. Make clear what you need — and be as concrete as possible. If you’re not getting the necessary resources for a project, you might say: “This is what we’re supposed to get done and unless we have more people dedicated to the project, we won’t be able to do it. Is there a way we can work on getting more resources?” Or if she’s being too hands off and not giving you enough input, you might say, “I need more insight from you along the way and I’m not sure how to get it.” You can also try to make it easier for her to give feedback. “You may want to describe actual events and how you handled them and then ask for advice on how you could’ve handled it differently,” says Hill.

Make the costs clear“People change but not unless they’re dissatisfied with their own behavior,” says Hill. For this reason, it’s important that you help your boss understand the costs of his behavior. Step into his shoes and try to understand what he really cares about. “That way you can show that what he wants to accomplish is at risk,” says Hill. If you can make the downsides of his conflict-avoidant behavior evident, he may be incented to change. For example, you might explain that by not directly addressing underperformance on your team, he’s alienating the high performers. Point to direct evidence, such as a team member’s disengagement.

Take matters into your own handsMcKeown suggests that instead of waiting for your boss to give you guidance and input, do it yourself. “Write a contract with your boss,” McKeown says. “Put down in writing what results you’re trying to achieve, the parameters you’re working within, and how you will be held accountable.” Then ask your boss to react to it and sign it. “At least you’ll have something concrete you can run towards,” he says. For some people, this seems pushy, but McKeown’s research shows it’s effective. “All the managers I’ve talked to say they’d welcome that level of initiative,” he says.

Tap your networkIn some cases, you may need to go above your boss and use your network to get feedback or resources. But don’t sneak around your boss if possible. Try to include him in those discussions. For example, you might discover that there is some slack in another department and tell your boss about it so he can ask that team leader for additional resources.

With a conflict-avoidant manager, it’s doubly important that you have strong relationships elsewhere in the organization, Hill says: “Build your network so it includes people a few levels up and so you have a legitimate reason to talk to them.” McKeown agrees on the importance of these connections: “Find someone who is not your boss’s boss but sits just outside your team who can be your spokesperson.”

Consider leaving if you canIt’s easy to assume that having a conflict-averse manager isn’t really a problem. But there are serious long-term effects. These kinds of bosses may not help you advance your career because they’re afraid to ruffle feathers and get you promoted. Or they may damage your credibility if they are seen as ineffective and others assume those on their teams are too. “People let it go on for a long time,” McKeown says. He suggests that you transfer to another department or leave the company if your boss is unable to change. “I would always prefer to work with someone who has some edge and is willing to challenge me to be better,” he says. If that doesn’t describe your boss, it may be time to find a new one.

Principles to Remember
Do:
·         Talk directly with your boss about what you need  —  and be as concrete as possible
·         Build your network so that you can rely on other people for help and resources
·         Make the costs of her behavior very clear — that’s the only way she’ll change

Don’t:
·         Hesitate to take matters into your own hands
·         Think of your boss as the enemy — he may not be aware of his behavior
·         Let it go on for too long — if possible consider transferring to another department or finding a new job

Case study #1: Get what you needFor just under a year, Matthew Hart* worked for a boss who tried desperately to be nice (we’ll call him Bryan). Bryan managed a team of 52 people at the credit card processing company where they worked  —  and avoided conflict at all costs. “He couldn’t step up when it came to making hard decisions,” Matthew explains.  “He wouldn’t make resource requests he promised to and gave in to unreasonable complaints.”

Matthew tried to talk with Bryan about the problem. “I was the voice for the team and explained how his behavior was affecting morale and causing turnover,” he says. He gave Bryan specific examples of the impact he was having on the team. “Everything that Bryan said in response was in line with what you’d read in a book — but that’s not how he acted,” Matthew says.

After failing in his direct attempts, Matthew resorted to going around Bryan: “I ended up getting what I wanted from those above him.” After Matthew got a promotion, he asked Bryan for more resources. When those requests didn’t come through, he talked with Bryan’s boss, the company’s CIO. “I asked him about the status of my requests and realized that he didn’t know about them,” he says. While Matthew didn’t like the idea of going around Bryan, he felt it was necessary: “I had direct reports who were counting on me to get them what they needed.”

It soon became obvious how damaging Bryan’s behavior was. “We lost four senior engineers and two managers in a three-month timeframe.” Eventually, Bryan was let go and Matthew and one of his colleagues were promoted to jointly fill Bryan’s role. “Most of the people that left have come back and our culture has dramatically changed for the better,” he says.

Case study #2: Don’t stay too longFor close to a decade, Carlon Cayenne worked at a petrochemical facility in the Caribbean. During that time he had numerous bosses but his last, a manager named Fred*, was one of the toughest. “He had a ‘country club’ management style. He was very sociable, always courteous, and approachable,” he says. But Fred was also indecisive and often looked to the team to make key decisions by consensus. He gave in to almost all instructions from the level above him, and rarely, if ever, pushed back. Carlon sensed that he did this in order to maintain a friendly and conflict-free work environment.
But if the team couldn’t agree on how to move forward on a particular project, they were stuck. And it wasn’t just their performance that was affected. Their relationships suffered, too. “The team lost credibility in the organization and some people struggled to move their careers forward,” Carlon says. Senior leaders scrutinized him and his peers because they worked for Fred and he felt his professional development opportunities were limited.

Because Fred was very approachable, Carlon felt comfortable raising these issues with him directly. “I would present the potential consequences or outcomes of decisions or situations as they arose and try to influence his choices,” he says. And when that didn’t work, he stepped in. “In some cases, I took charge of the situation and reassured him by assuming responsibility for the outcomes,” Carlon says.
He worked for Fred for three years until he decided to leave the company to take another job. Several of his colleagues have also since left — but Fred is still there.


PHILOSOPHY

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20 Inspiring Quotes from Mahatma Gandhi:
1.       “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”
2.       “A man is but a product of his thoughts. What he thinks he becomes.”
3.       “Be the change that you want to see in the world.”
4.       “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.”
5.       “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.”
6.       “Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.”
7.       “An ounce of patience is worth more than a tonne of preaching.”
8.       “Change yourself – you are in control.”
9.       “See the good in people and help them.”
10.   “Without action, you aren’t going anywhere.”
11.   “Take care of this moment.”
12.   “Be congruent, be authentic, be your true self.”
13.   “Continue to grow and evolve.”
14.   “A no uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘Yes’ uttered merely to please, or worse, to avoid trouble.”
15.   “Glory lies in the attempt to reach one’s goal and not in reaching it.”
16.   "An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.”
17.   “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
18.   “A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave.”
19.   “Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
20.   “In a gentle way, you can shake the world.”

Quotes from Albert Einstein
  • "Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius -- and a lot of courage -- to move in the opposite direction."
  • "Imagination is more important than knowledge."
  • "Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love."
  • "I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details."
  • "The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax."
  • "Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
  • "The only real valuable thing is intuition."
  • "A person starts to live when he can live outside himself."
  • "I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice."
  • "God is subtle but he is not malicious."
  • "Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."
  • "I never think of the future. It comes soon enough."
  • "The eternal mystery of the world is its comprehensibility."
  • "Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing."
  • "Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind."
  • "Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."
  • "Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds."
  • "Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler."
  • "Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen."
  • "Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it."
  • "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
  • "The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education."
  • "God does not care about our mathematical difficulties. He integrates empirically."
  • "The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking."
  • "Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."
  • "Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding."
  • "The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible."
  • "We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."
  • "Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school."
  • "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing."
  • "Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater."
  • "Equations are more important to me, because politics is for the present, but an equation is something for eternity."
  • "If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut."
  • "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
  • "As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."
  • "Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods."
  • "I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
  • "In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep."
  • "The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."
  • "Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves."
  • "Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism -- how passionately I hate them!"
  • "No, this trick won't work...How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"
  • "My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind."
  • "Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever."
  • "The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking...the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker."
  • "Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence."
  • "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed."
  • "A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeeded be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death."
  • "The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through striving after rational knowledge."
  • "Now he has departed from this strange world a little ahead of me. That means nothing. People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion."
  • "You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."
  • "One had to cram all this stuff into one's mind for the examinations, whether one liked it or not.  This coercion had such a deterring effect on me that, after I had passed the final examination, I found the consideration of any scientific problems distasteful to me for an entire year."
  • "...one of the strongest motives that lead men to art and science is escape from everyday life with its painful crudity and hopeless dreariness, from the fetters of one's own ever-shifting desires. A finely tempered nature longs to escape from the personal life into the world of objective perception and thought."
  • "He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder."
  • "A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest... a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."
  • "Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts."
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Moral and Ethics Qoutes











Moral Lesson from Echo

"A little boy and his father were walking on the mountains.
Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams: "AAAhhhhhhhh! !!"

To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating,
somewhere in the mountain:
"AAAhhhhhhhhhhh! !!"

Curious, the little boy yells: "Who are you?"
He receives the answer: "Who are you?"

And then the boy screams to the mountain: "You're Stupid"
The voice answers: "You're Stupid"

Frustrated at the response, the boy screams: "I Hate You"
He receives the answer: "I Hate You"

He looks to his father and asks: "What's going on?"
The father smiles and says: "My son, pay attention."

The man screams: "You are a champion!"
The voice answers: "You are a champion!"

The boy is surprised, but does not understand.
Then the father explains: "People call this ECHO, but
really this is LIFE. It gives you back everything you
say or do. Our life is simply a reflection of our actions.

If you want more love in the world, create
 more love in your heart. If you want people
to respect you, respect them.
This relationship applies to everything, in all
aspects of life. Life will give you back everything you have given to it.

The Millionaire and Three Beggars


There was a good-natured millionaire in the town. Three beggars thought of approaching him for help.

The first man went to the millionaire and said: "O Boss! I want five rupees. Please give me." The millionaire was taken aback at this man's impudence. "What! You demand five rupees from me as though I owe you the money! How dare you? How can I afford to give five rupees to a single beggar?  Here, take these two rupees and get away," he said. The man went away with the two rupees.

The next beggar went to the millionaire and said: "Oh Boss! I have not taken a square meal for the past ten days. Please help me."

"How much do you want?" asked the millionaire.

"Whatever you give me," replied the beggar.

"Here, take this ten rupee note. You can have nice food for at least three days." The beggar walked away with the ten rupee note.

The third beggar came. "Oh Boss, I have heard about your noble qualities. Therefore, I have come to see you. Men of such charitable disposition are verily the manifestations of God on earth," he said.

"Please sit down," said the millionaire. "You appear to be tired. Please take this food," he said, and offered food to the beggar.

"Now please tell me what I can do for you."

   "Oh Boss," replied the beggar; "I merely came to meet such a noble personage that you are. You have given me this rich food already. What more need I get from you? You have already shown extraordinary kindness towards me. May God bless you!"

But the millionaire, struck by the beggar's spirit, begged of the beggar to remain with him, built a decent house for him in his own compound, and looked after him for the rest of his life.

God is like this good millionaire. Three classes of people approach Him, with three different desires and prayers. There is the greedy man full of vanity, full of arrogance, full of desires. He demands the objects of worldly enjoyment from God. Since this man, whatever be his vile desires, has had the good sense to approach God, He grants him some part of the desired objects (even these very soon pass away, just as the two rupees the first beggar got are spent before nightfall).

 The other type of devotee prays to the Lord for relief from the sufferings of the world, but is better than the first one, in as much as he is ready to abide by His Will. To him the Lord grants full relief from suffering, and bestows on him much wealth and property




PRODUCTIVITY